Tag: health

Random Thoughts

The last few days have put me into a prolonged, slow burning state of freak out. Fun.

My friend’s father passed away on Monday. My father went into the hospital on Tuesday. No details on either situation will be forthcoming. We just got clobbered by a thunderstorm which, it turns out, was rough enough to knock out the power in the hospital. The backup generators kicked in a second later, but woah.

I am planning to go to the hospital after work tonight. I need to make dinner first but then I’ll go for a quick visit before visiting hours end. Tomorrow morning is the funeral. I’ll go to the hospital afterwards. How’s that for a tough day? The last few days have been bad, but tomorrow… woah.

On less important (re: not important at all) topics, I have one more episode of The Umbrella Academy’s final season to watch. I strongly suspect that once I finish that final episode I will immediately start a rewatch of the entire series from season one episode one. I think that is going to happen.

Earlier today I was looking at Threads (the twitter alternative social network made by the same assholes who make instagram and bookfayce which begs the question why the fuck am I giving this new social network site the time of day) and I posted that musically speaking, today is a Porcupine Tree kinda day (from a mental health standpoint, of course… meaning heavy and complicated and confusing if you’re not paying close attention). TWELVE MINUTES LATER I got a notification that the Porcupine Tree instagram account had been ported to Threads. They haven’t posted anything yet but I guess I should say you’re welcome?

I don’t know what the dad situation is going to be like this weekend but I do know that Bellana, my step daughter, is coming over for a visit. All the bad, scary stuff going on feels a little more bearable when the kids come by. I am really looking forward to seeing how she did at her conference this week. I want all the sciency details.

Speaking of science, from a nutritional standpoint I screwed up yesterday. I spent the whole day at the hospital with Dad and when I left the house I forgot to take my pill case with me. I took my breakfast vitamin pills before I left, and took my lunch vitamin pills when I got home for dinner. I was going to take my dinner vitamin pills before I went to sleep, but I fell asleep earlier than expected and missed that dose. Dummy. Note to self: bring the friggin’ pill case tomorrow. Dumb ass.

What else? Word from the hospital this afternoon is that Dad is starting to show early signs of coming out of whatever was wrong. My fingers and toes and eyes are all firmly crossed. Again, I am not sharing details beyond a small hint of optimism. Enjoy it while you can.

Okay, Robert. Stop stressing and get back to work. You have stuff to do. Do it.

Stomach Dance

Me and my stomach have been doing that gastric bypass patient dance all day today. We’re having trouble getting along. We need to work together but today we’re causing problems for each other.

I have eaten three meals. Each meal came with a stomach problem of varying degrees.

I had a protein bar for breakfast. I went a little too fast and felt that blocked/stuck feeling. It wasn’t bad enough to become nausea or to produce large amounts of extra saliva that I have to spit out. I tried gagging it up but nothing came. I had to pause eating for about half an hour before the blockage was gone and then I was able to finish.

I had a burger (cooked on the grill) and some french fries for lunch. The burger went down without any issues. The fries though. I only had about four of them and I should have stopped at three. I felt a little blocked again. I think I was going too fast this time as well. It was never bad enough to require any spitting up. I don’t know how long it took to pass, but it wasn’t long. As soon as I declared myself done with lunch I was off to my father’s so it was probably a couple of hours before I even thought about eating or drinking anything else.

I had a big piece of chicken and a little bit of white rice for dinner. Well, it was big for me. about three ounces. The chicken went down fine. The rice felt a little off. I only had two small fork fulls. I was okay afterward though. I stopped in time to avoid any problems. When I finished dinner I was a smidge below my daily protein goal. I waited about 20 minutes and then had a little tiny protein bar snack. It went bad. I think this time I took too big a bite and it got stuck for real. I gagged up a tiny bit of it and have been spitting out saliva for about half an hour now.

So there we have it. All summed up. Three meals, three stomach issues. Yippee. My doctor told me that in almost every case when there is a stomach problem after eating it’s really the patient’s fault. In all three cases this was my fault. It actually makes me feel better knowing that. If it’s something I did rather than something going on with my new stomach, then it’s something I can control.

220 pounds lost since the surgery. Yeah, these sort of things are 100% worth it. Absolutely.

Stuff Going On

I have two things going on today besides work. First, I had to visit my father to help out with that thing that he needs help with that I am not going into details on. I usually do it after work, but tonight there is the second thing going on. Tonight is the first band practice in about a month or so.

I just got home from my father’s place. All went well. He’s good for the day. Nice. When I got home I logged back in to work and sent off a facebook messenger message to the band. Are we still on? As of right now we are, but one band member may have traffic issues. We’re keeping our fingers crossed.

I also just ordered a capo from amazon. I know I have one somewhere, but I just can’t find it. I’ll have to go with the alternate tuning solution tonight if we play that one new song. I’ll have a capo for the next practice, I promise.

I’m not sure how dinner is going to work tonight. We still need to figure that out. I expect it’s going to be protein supplements for ol’ Robbie, but I want my beloved bride to have something nice.

Okay, back to work with you, Mr. Robert.

Sugar Crash

My last two check ins with my weight loss surgery surgeon included a lot of talk about low blood sugar incidents. What triggers it, how to fix it, what it feels like.

Just the other day I was thinking about that subject and how it feels like it’s been a long time since I’ve had a low blood sugar episode. I pondered, what is it that I am doing now that is preventing the issue that I wasn’t doing six months ago? Whatever it is, I am happy about it because going a long time without that particular side effect was making me happy.

Fast forward to today. I’m in the grocery store, grocery shopping and I started feeling a little foggy headed. My hands started shaking. I felt weak. Aw, damn it. I thought about it the other day and jinxed myself. My days-without-a-low-blood-sugar-incident streak is officially over.

I sat in the car and had something to eat and felt a little better. I still feel a little beat up but that’s not the point of this post. The point of this post is I jinxed myself and that makes me sad. Maybe I’ll work on some music to cheer myself up. That would be both fun and productive.

Priorities are Jerks

Is doing the right thing overrated? Are priorities jerks?

Wednesday night I got a little less than six hours of sleep. I was really tired through most of the day on Thursday. I wanted to go to bed early last night but I ended up going to bed late. Fail. Then at about 3:30am I woke up with stomach pain. I have been doing a really shitty job over the last few days of eating three square meals. Three nights in a row I’ve had protein bars for dinner. It caught up to me. I was dealing with hunger pain a lot yesterday. I just couldn’t keep my stomach topped off for very long. I ate something before bed but it wasn’t enough and I was hurting when I woke up in the middle of the night. I had a little protein bar and felt better but I couldn’t fall back to sleep. It was annoying.

The end result? Less than five hours of sleep, and that includes over sleeping by about an hour. That lead to another question. Do I do my normal morning exercise and skip playing some guitar before work, or do I skip some or all of my exercise and play guitar. Ugh. I did the right thing. I did my exercise. I did not play guitar. I punched in to work at 8:50 with plenty of time to spare before the start of my shift, but I did not get any 50/90 challenge work done. No music for me.

Bummer. Maybe I’ll be able to sneak some work in tonight. Also, maybe I’ll have actual dinner tonight instead of just protein supplements. Not that there is anything wrong with that. I just don’t want to have hunger pains today. Let’s do the right thing, m’kay?

Pain

I don’t know what I did to earn it, but oh my goodness the pain.

Yesterday, out of the blue, I got a massive pain in my left side. It included my left arm, particularly the elbow. What the hell? All the left here made me think heart attack at first, but it’s really nowhere near my heart. I think I must have pulled a muscle or something. Any time I reach out or up with my left arm it sets it off and BOOM, huge pain. What the hell, bro? I didn’t do anything to hurt myself. I must have zigged when I should have zagged, but it wasn’t enough for me to actually notice that something was going wrong.

Ouch town, population… me.

So I plan to try to force myself to not extend my left arm very much for a day or two and see if it gets better. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to not extend your left arm? I keep doing it and it keeps hurting. What a jerk. What a doofus.

Fortunately though, it did not stop me from doing my morning exercise and, more importantly, it did not stop me from playing the guitar, babie! I had enough time to work on three songs today. As I mentioned in a recent post, I swapped out my ES-335 for my SG. The SG has been neglected of late. I bought a new strap for each guitar months and months ago and I never even opened the SG’s case to put it on. Even after playing for about an hour this morning I still haven’t used the new strap. Soon though. You’ll see.

My playing was garbage, of course, but I don’t care. Happy Friday, folks!

323/365
323/365

Good(?) Morning

I woke up in a mood today. I don’t know what is bothering me. I feel a sense of doom and gloom. Am I suddenly psychic (Robert pauses the narrative to let anyone reading along finish laughing hysterically) and something is on the horizon?

Nope. Just in another bitchy mood. I didn’t get enough sleep last night and it shows. I have a small project at work that is hanging over me like a dark cloud. It’s not a big deal, I just don’t have the energy to deal with it. Crud, right?

The traffic was crappy this morning, but it was the normal level of crappy, not some extra thick level of crappy or anything. I don’t know.

Hey, did you watch the season finale of The Acolyte last night? It was good. I liked it. I liked the whole season though I will quickly admit that the action heavy episodes were by far the best of the bunch. No spoilers, but that scene last night where you actually see the light saber do that thing that light sabers are supposed to be able to do? You know, the thing that we never saw Anakin or Dooku or Maul or Palpatine actually do even though we all saw the end result? Hint Hint Sithy Hint? Awesome.

That should be putting me in a good mood, right? Star Wars is like my own personal dopamine fix. Nope. I was all smiles watching it last night, but today? Grumpy gus. Or should I call myself Darth Grumpy Gus? Does that work better?

No guitar playing today. Maybe before work tomorrow. I did use a guitar for today’s photo a day picture. I think the next time I play I am going to use a different guitar. I haven’t played my Gibson SG in ages and it’s kind of calling to me. My wife thinks that guitar looks cool so that alone should be incentive to play it more often, don’t you think?

Okay. Cheer up, everyone. It’s hump day or some shit. For my personal work week, once I get through the day in the office today, I am working from home for the rest of the week. That should cheer me up, right? Ugh.

321/365
321/365

Fun with Gastric Bypass Life

Fun with Gastric Bypass Life. I had a nice dinner. Chicken curry, a little white rice, and a little sweet potato. Nice. Maybe 5-6 ounces of food in total. No problems. My stomach was happy. No foamies, no discomfort, all was right with the world.

20 minutes later, without warning, I puked up the whole thing.

Sure I lost 220 pounds and I wouldn’t change a thing and it was 100% absolutely worth every side effect I have to deal with, but… the fuck?

So what do I put on the no fly list? The chicken curry and the sweet potatoes were the same color (approximately) so which one caused the problem? I don’t know.

2.5 Hours to Go

The countdown to the end of the work day and the start of my long weekend continues. I was pulled into a meeting for the stretch of time that I was planning to have lunch so I had to delay my break for an hour. It’s 3:00pm now and I am just wrapping up my lunch. My stomach has been okay for most of the day, though I’ve twice been hit with empty stomach hunger pains. The second time was at 11:00am while I was in a (different) meeting and it was pretty uncomfortable. A protein bar and some sugar free chocolate at 11:30 put me right. I’m optimistic that I had enough lunch to hold off any further issues until I get home. Cross those fingers, kids.

For the third day in a row I am trying to get through the day while dealing with feelings of exhaustion. Why? I got a decent night’s sleep last night. I should feel better today than I did yesterday or the day before, right? Nope. I am super tired once again. Last night at about 9:00pm I could barely keep my eyes open. Then, magically, by 10:00 I was wide awake. I was able to get to sleep by 11:00 though so I thought it would be okay. Today I’ve just been wiped out all day. If this comes up again tomorrow I might actually take a nap. Wouldn’t that be fun? I mean, I am old so of course it would be fun. The older you get the more that a good solid nap is a thrill ride. Bring it on, people!

Okay. Back to work. I have a meeting in 18 minutes, and a long weekend two hours after that. Power through, Robert!