Nope

Daily writing prompt
What are your favorite emojis?
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Yeah, I’m an adult so….

If I were a tween, 11 or 12 years old or so, I might find this writing prompt endlessly fascinating but I am old. Really old so… sorry, Skippy, I ain’t playing today.

Sure, I text or chat the odd thumbs up or happy face now and then but that is all. I didn’t bitch when the name “emoticon” was erased from the vernacular and replaced with emoji. I’m sure the Illuminati that secretly runs the internet had some fierce debates on that topic, but I wasn’t in on them so I just let it slide.

I will admit that I may have shed a metaphorical tear for the future of humanity when I learned that The Emoji Movie existed. That was too much for me to deal with.

So what I am saying is that I don’t have a favorite emoji. I remember the early days of America Online and therefore… “:)”

.

Right? If you love emoji then I love you for it. You do you, my brothers and sisters and only friends.

Doing the Right Thing Can Suck

I am scheduled for Jury Duty a week from Monday. May 6th, to be exact. I booked time off from work for the day like a good citizen of The Commonwealth of Massachusetts. Good boy.

Today I came as close to hitting the lottery as I’ll ever come. I got a letter from the state. You always get a letter from the state about a week before Jury Duty. It usually says that you need to call the courthouse you were assigned to the business day before you are schedule to appear and they will tell you if you have to show up or not. That’s not what I got this time. This time the letter just said that they don’t need me and I don’t have to go. Sweet! It’s like a get out of jail free card… or just a get out of jury duty free card. Let’s not mix the metaphorical side of the courtroom bar I would have been sitting on… or whatever. You know what I mean, right? Right.

So I have the day off of work on Monday and I don’t have to do anything to earn it! WOOHOO!

That’s when the guilt started hitting me. Stupid guilt. Two days after my scheduled civic duty is my birthday (53 years old, you geriatric fart) and I took a vacation day that day just because. It’s my special day, or some crap like that. So I… I let the guilt take over. I logged into work and canceled my Jury Duty time off request. Ugh. Why did I do that? Because it was the right thing to do? Ugh… you putz. Just take the free day off. No… I’ll work that day. I might even drive into the office.

Idiot.

Why Can’t They Win at Home?

The Boston Red Sox kicked off a home stand tonight at Fenway Park.

They are trailing the Cubs 5-1 in the top of the seventh inning. The odds of them winning were low even before the Cubbies took an early lead.

Why?

Because the Red Sox can’t win at home. Why can’t the Red Sox win at home? What’s going on? It’s Fenway Freakin’ Park? Hows abouts you win some games at home, Red Sox? Let’s cut the shit.

In other Boston sports news, the Bruins play the Leafs in game four of their first round series in Toronto tomorrow night. I really wish tomorrow’s game was tonight. I hate the random two day breaks during the playoffs. One day off between games is plenty. Cut the crap, NHL. I wants me my hockey games!

Okay, enough sports for this post.

Go Red Sox (puh-leeze!)

Go Bruins.