Why Can’t I Sleep

Four out of the last five nights I’ve had epically bad sleep. I’m talking pre-CPAP therapy level bad sleep. Over the last week the nights that weren’t legendarily bad still weren’t good.

Why can’t I sleep anymore? Worry and stress and guilt are surely part of it, but why is it so much worse now than it was a couple of weeks ago? Nothing has changed.

My watch tells me that last night I got 3:45. How am I even alive anymore? What the hell, bro?


It is so windy outside that it feels like nature is trying to huff and puff and blow our house down. It’s howling loud enough to almost keep me from falling asleep. Almost.

G’night, big bad wolf.

Light Up the Falls

This is a photo of the Spicket Falls dam in Methuen.

2010-02-28 - spicket flood level 015

This is a really terrible picture of Niagara Falls with some of the colored night lights turned on.


The two things have nothing in common other than they show water falling off a cliff. In New York/Ontario it’s natural. In Methuen it’s man made. That isn’t relevant though.

The city has announced an art project where they are going to install colored lights that local artists will be able to use to create light shows on the water falling over the edge of the Spicket Falls dam. It’s going to open for a test run some time in the fall, and then open for real in the spring of 2022. The water flow is only that high during the rainiest times of year so I don’t think this will be a year round thing… but it is cool.

Covid-19 notwithstanding, Robbie is going to bring his camera. Bank on it.

Quarantine Project Free

It’s weird. Now that RPM is over I don’t have any projects planned. I don’t think I’ll do another album in a month. I think I’m burned out on that for now. Well… for today at least. As Traffic once said, Who Knows What Tomorrow May Bring?

I still have a couple of songs to finish on the latest round of re-recordings. I think I have three that still need a guitar part and some mixing. I also thought about remixing the second round of re-recordings. I decided recently that I did something to mess up the guitar sounds and I should fix it. The downside of this is that I will always be able to find something wrong and I will always want to go back and fix it. Nothing is ever finished.

Outside of that? Nothing, really. Maybe I’ll find a guitar teacher on the youtubes and actually try and learn something instead of just yankin’ my own musical chain. Hell, I should have started that last March. After a year I might be almost tolerably not terrible.

Really though, the only thing on my agenda going forward is getting the damn vaccine. Everyone in my house needs it and we all need it right now. I’m tired of this crap.

A Pretty Good Sunday

Things that were good today, not in order of importance:

  • I finished this year’s RPM Challenge
  • The Bruins beat the Rangers
  • We got a new waffle iron and it made some really good waffles.
  • Also in food news, Jen made a roast tonight and it was scary how good it was.
  • The Red Sox played their first Sprint training game. Sure, they lost to the Twinkies, but the important thing is that they played.
  • The Walking Dead came back.
  • My father, who went into the hospital on January 29th, came home. I mean, he’s going back in on Wednesday but the point is he finally came home. My father went home today!

Almost Done

I just finished mixing song #18 of 20. The last two are duds so I am going to give my ears a little bit of a rest. Just for a few minutes.

I’ve finished three of the five songs that I rescued from the January album-in-a-month fail and I’m thinking that I might have been better off leaving them where they were. Two of them are okay, I guess, but I don’t think any of them are going to make it into the 10 song album I submit to RPM headquarters.

This one is on the bubble:

This one is also on the bubble, but it really doesn’t have a chance:

I have sorted all of the songs I’ve finished so far into three lists. A, B, and C. There are six songs on the A list and they are all going into the final submission. Those are the winners. There are five songs on the C list and they are definitely not going on the final submission. They will go on the leftovers album. The two songs I still have left to mix are likely going onto the C list. The remaining seven are on the B list. They could go either way. I have to re-review them and pick three to move to the A list. The 18 songs combined have a total run time of one hour and 16 minutes. If I move more than three songs from B to A I just have to make sure the leftovers run for more than 35 minutes so that it too qualifies as an RPM Challenge Album.

So many factors. At least I have a cover and a title. I figured those out weeks ago.

Not quite done yet, but I’m getting there. My ears are very tired but it’s worth it.

Happy Last RPM Challenge Day.