Sunday Morning

It’s 7:13am on a Sunday morning in January. What’s going on?

Tons. I’m going to have a busy day, I think.

My exercise is done for the day, as well as over 60% of my calorie goal. Nice. I am going to visit my father today and take him to visit my mother. I’m not going to have a ton of time to spend visiting though. I have to work today. I have a ton of paperwork to do that should have been done over the last week but got pushed aside due to some super hot customer issues. I’ll get as much of it done today as possible and get to the rest of it tomorrow. I’ll have it all done on time, but it’s going to make today suck a little.

What about the new cat? She started under the bed. We took one of the little covered cat bed/house things we got for Patches last year and put it into the bedroom. We also brought the cat tree we got for the cellar remodel and put that in the bedroom too. We sat in the room with her for a while but eventually just left her alone. Jen snuck back in to check on her and found her sitting in the cat bed/house. She called to me to come and see and when I called back the cat got spooked and ran into the bathroom and hid under the vanity. Sorry, kitty. She stayed there for hours, even when we left her alone again.

When we started getting ready for bed she was in the bed/house thing again. She stayed there the whole time. We thought that was an improvement. Around 2:30am Jen got up for something and managed to coax her out. She was purring like a porche and rubbing against our legs and just being super friendly. We got her to jump up onto the bed so we could pet the crap out of her. She seemed to love it. When we tried to lay down though she jumped off and tried to hide behind the cat tree. After a minute or so she ran out of the room and down the hall. I found her in the other bathroom crouching behind the door. When I moved the door a little she ran back to the bedroom and went back into the bed/house.

While she was walking around in the middle of the night, Jen was able to show her where the food and water and litter box are. We had all of it in the bedroom because we wanted them close so she could find them if she needed them. I am a little worried because I don’t see any signs that she’s eaten anything yet. We had dry food and lots of treats and we put them out for her, but I also went to a pet store to buy some toys (Patches didn’t really go for cat toys so we didn’t have any) and some wet food. I am going to put some of the wet food out this morning and see if she goes for it. We were told that she had surgery on Friday (she was spayed) so she might not have an appetite as she recovers. I just want to give her all the options we can though.

What else is going on? Music. Have I played the guitar at all this weekend? No, no I haven’t. Asshole. I am starting to think about recording ideas for RPM, even if I haven’t had a single musical thought. I am considering going with two amps at a time again. I have my Fender Deluxe Reverb here so that amp is going to be used like crazy. I might bring out my Fender Bassbreaker 18/30 and use it and the Deluxe Reverb together through the AB/Y splitter. It’s going to be pretty loud down here if I go this route, so I might try it to start with and then change my mind. The amps will be in a corner of the cellar that is as far away from the living room as I can get, and it’s reasonably far away from Jen’s office so hopefully it will be okay. If I bother her at all though, I’ll turn off the 18/30 and just go with the Deluxe. I have a speaker soak for the Deluxe so I can turn up the volume knob without getting obscenely loud. As for the guitar I want to use, it will be the Les Paul Standard again. I freakin’ adore that guitar. I will wait until either next weekend or the actual start of February before I put new strings on the guitar, but I really need to play at least a little bit every day to try and get my fingers into something that resembles playing shape.

Okay, I think that’s the gist of today. It’s time to start waking up for real and get something to eat. Happy Sunday, folks!

Back to Reality

Oh boy, is this a bummer.

It’s Monday. Vacation is over. It is time to get back to the week day routine. Crud.

I tried very hard to close all three of my activity rings over the course of the vacation. Unfortunately, on Thursday, our last park day, I hit a level of exhaustion that I don’t think I’ve ever hit before. I lost the ability to focus my eyes. It was scary. My stand and exercise rings were closed, but my activity (calorie) ring had quite a ways to go. It couldn’t be helped. I was thinking I was at the start of another migraine so I got into bed, buried my eyes under the pillow, and went to sleep with my third ring still open.

My success streak had come to an end, and over the next two days we were going to be in the car all day. I made the choice to just not worry about it until we got home. Then when we got home I was so out of sorts that I decided to take the weekend off too. Well, the weekend is over. It’s 6:48am and my exercise ring is closed. I jogged (pronounced “yog”, with a soft “J”) in place for 31.5 minutes which closed the exercise ring and 64% of the move ring. I plan to start lifting the hand weights a little again today too. I fell off that wagon months ago and it’s time to start that up again.

A couple of other points on this random Monday morning. Last night I watched the first episode of The Last of Us and HOLY CRAP was that good. So good. I am absolutely riveted. I never played the game so all I know of the story is from the trailer, but that was enough to know that the first half hour of the show was leading us directly to something gut wrenching and boy did it ever. I am so psyched for episode two next week. I am going to find every podcast covering the show that I can and queue them all up today. I am 100% on board with the hype.

I placed an order with the film lab I’ve been using, Old School Photo Lab in Dover, NH, on Saturday but I haven’t had a chance to drop the film in the mail yet. I was thinking of doing it this morning, but we got a little snow last night and I just don’t want to deal with it. Tomorrow will probably see me starting my work day super early, so maybe at lunch time tomorrow? Maybe at lunch today if the ice from last night melts a little. I haven’t checked the forecast yet. We’ll see. I have six rolls from Disney World and I want to see how they came out. I also have two rolls of black and white from around christmas that are going too. Once all of that is back I am going to slow down on the film for a while. I have a roll in progress in Dad’s camera that I would like to finish, and a roll in my camera that I haven’t taken the first shot with. That roll is going to sit there for a few months, I think. Once Dad’s roll is done I will take a couple of months off again.

Okay, it’s almost 7:00am. Time to go upstairs and start the day for real. My two week vacation is over. Pity me.

Christmas Eve Eve

It’s christmas Eve Eve. The last work day before a three day Santa Clausy weekend. The work days have been quiet this week and I am thankful. Remind me to mention it next Thanksgiving.

My father is home from the rehab hospital. Did I mention that yesterday? I can’t remember.

There’s supposed to be an ass kicker of a rain storm going on outside right now. When I got out of bed around 5:40 (an hour ago) I looked outside and it didn’t seem too bad. I might sneak over to CVS after they open and see if I can get a padded mailing envelop and a sharpie or two. I have something to ship to Minnesota and it is bugging me that I haven’t taken care of it yet. I also finished my test roll of film that combines my Nikon camera with Dad’s Pentax lens. I want to send that roll off for developing to make sure the combo works before I take it to Florida. I might take the lens that came with my camera from ebay too even though it’s in pretty rough shape. Maybe alternate days? Dad’s lens the first time we go to a specific park and mine the second? Who knows.

I just finished a (simulated) four mile run. If I had actually run four miles my legs would have fallen off and my head would have exploded. You know how it is.

Christmas Eve is a big day ’round these parts. We have a little family get together every non-Covid year. This year, in the spirit of hybrid work environments, we’re having a sort of hybrid christmas eve get together. That just means the guest list is smaller and there won’t be as much food consumed. The food thing doesn’t have anything to do with the guest list, it just means I don’t have a stomach anymore. I would also like to visit both of my parents, if I can. I would also like to take Dad’s camera to the ocean, maybe. I would also like to clean the kitchen and the bathrooms and the living room a little, but that won’t take a lot of time. We’ll see if I can get to any of that stuff.

Today, apart from the usual work day stuff, I want to bake cookies and make Tewksbury Tweets. We made the dough for the cookies yesterday, but it needs to sit in the ‘fridge before going in the oven. I wanted to make some Tweets, but there was a cat documentary on Netflix and you know how that is, right?

Okay, time to eat some breakfast and take a shower and do all of that boring morning stuff that doesn’t make for a good blog entry but I often write about anyway because I am a stinking rank amateur at this stuff.

Sunday

Motivation is tough to come by right now. I woke up at 5:40am, did my 30 minutes of exercise, ate some breakfast, watched an episode of Pennyworth and a bunch of film photography youtube videos, and that’s it. It’s almost 8:00am now and motivation is sort of escaping me.

The whole getting up early to get my exercise in before anyone wakes up thing is kicking my ass. Both in the exercising sense and in the not sleeping enough sense. I kinda feel zombiesque this morning. The background music on this particular grainydays episode isn’t helping.

It’s not like I have a lot on the agenda at the moment. The kids aren’t coming until late morning so all I really have to do is take a shower and clean off the exercise sweat. I could maybe put up some more outdoor christmas lights too, but other than that and prepping some lasagna for dinner there isn’t much on the docket this morning. Really all I need to do is stand up, walk upstairs, and take a friggin’ shower. I just don’t wanna.

Oh, and yesterday I said I needed to do car music this morning or NaSoAlMo was going to die a slow, painful death. Re-read the above three paragraphs and take note of how I did not mention car music at all. Rest in Peace 2022 NaSoAlMo… we hardly new ye.

Okay… wake up, asshole. Go get some shit done.

Week 29 Weigh In

Hello my friends and loyal readers! Welcome to the official Week 29 Weigh In post!

It’s amazing how gun shy one less than impressive week has made me. It’s also amazing how stupidly unpredictable weight loss can be. Yesterday I stepped on the scale as soon as I got out of bed. I was down about two pounds since last Wednesday. I did not record my weight, I was just paranoid about having a bad weigh in this week so I snuck a peek early to get a glimpse into the future. The number was good, but not spectacular.

I did it again today, but this time it’s official. I got out of bed and stepped on the scale and I am down 4.2 pounds for the week. Wow! That means I lost about two pounds yesterday. How ridiculous is that? Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining at all. It’s just that losing two pounds yesterday implies that I could gain two pounds today. I need to stop stressing about this and just go back to one scale moment each week.

We’re in a state these days where three pounds a week feels epic. Now we hit four pounds and it’s like, Wow! I now weigh 263.6 pounds which seven months ago was absolutely unimaginable. I have lost 167.8 pounds since the surgery on May 4, 2022. I have lost 188.4 pounds since the first visit to the clinic on January 19, 2022. My BMI is down 0.5 points this week to 32.1. Like I said, ridiculous.

I was thinking of a sort of mini goal of seeing if I could hit 200 pounds overall by the time we go to Disney World on January 4, 2023. That’s only 11.6 more pounds. That’s an average of less than two pounds per week for six more weeks. That’s doable, but the real goal should be hitting 200 pounds by the anniversary of the first weigh in. That date is eight weeks from tomorrow. If I somehow manage to average 4.025 pounds per week for those eight weeks then I could hit 200 pounds since the surgery by that date. I’m not holding my breath on that though. Four pounds per week is not happening, despite hitting four pounds this week. We’ll see how close I can get.

My exercise routine got weird yesterday and it continued to today. I stopped at 30 minutes because my pace was all screwed up. The first mile was faster than eight minutes. I kept the pace consistent and the second mile pace was almost 20 minutes. It wasn’t that extreme today but it was just as dumb. I stopped at 30 minutes again, then watched the second half of Andor while eating breakfast and then ran for another 30 minutes. Same thing happened, but the two trots-in-place were enough to close my Move ring (calorie count) so I’ll take it.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Back in the pre-surgery diet days that would make tomorrow a massive cheat day. Not this time. Those days are over. I am going to have about four ounces of food and that’s it. Last night I had more than that for dinner because I was WAY behind on my protein goal and it made me sick. It wasn’t due to a mistake like eating too fast or not chewing enough (which are my two common mistakes), it was just because I was completely full and my new little stomach didn’t like that. So I am cutting myself off despite the holiday. Four ounces is all you get, Robert.

That doesn’t change the fact that Thanksgiving is probably my favorite holiday of the year though. I just love it. Food or no food. It’s almost time to punch into work, and the day before Thanksgiving is traditionally the slowest, most agonizing day of the year… so duck and cover, kids. Good luck to you all, and may you all have a happy Wednesday is Weigh In Day today.

Harry is Home

Harry is home and it’s glorious!

Not sure what we have on the agenda today. Jen and Harry are going to go shopping for desserts for tomorrow’s mini-thanksgiving. I am going to make short visits to both parents. Also, in film camera news, there are train tracks running behind the rehab facility that Dad is currently visiting and I have black and white film in the camera… cliche, anyone?

I did 30 minutes of faux running today already. My sort of plan these days is 45 minutes on weekdays and 30 on weekends to give my feet a little bit of a break. I haven’t closed my calorie/move ring, but it’s 2/3 closed. I’ll close it today, no sweat.

What else? I want to play some guitar today, but I want to hang around doin’ nuttin’ with Harry and Jen more so… National Solo Album Month may be dying on the vine this year. I might try to get up stupidly early this week and spend an hour or so recording using DI and amp sims rather than my Deluxe Reverb. That feels like cheating after all these years of only using a real amp, but what can you do.

I mentioned yesterday that I had a really bad time with lunch. The same thing happened with dinner. I dished out a little less than four ounces of food, took 2-3 bites, and hit the pain/nausea failure point. I ended up pausing dinner for an hour or so and then I was okay. I was nervous about breakfast today after two bad experiences in a row, but I am almost finished an I feel okay. Here’s hoping lunch and dinner go okay too.

All right, kids. Time to go get my shit together and go visit a couple of parents. We’ll talk later, m’kay? M’kay.

Lunch Break

It’s been a busy day today. Lots going on at work. I’m trying to squeeze in a lunch break, but it started half an hour later and it’s been interrupted once already.

Last night I was dreading coming to work today. I think everything that went on over the weekend, with my aunt’s funeral and my parents health situations, was starting to really weigh on me and I didn’t feel up to anything. Now that I am neck deep in work I am sort of glad I didn’t call out because I would be swamped tomorrow. Still. I’m feeling a little overwhelmed. Not completely overwhelmed, but a little overwhelmed. I’ll manage.

I’m having a little trouble with lunch today. My stomach is a little unhappy. I had a little trouble with breakfast too. It’s the first time in three days or so that I haven’t eaten just protein bars for breakfast and lunch, so maybe that’s part of it. I’ll manage.

In good news, I asked the kids when they were starting their Thanksgiving break and it turns out they have all of next week off. I figured they would still have school right up to the day before the holiday, but nope. Harry said he’s coming here on Friday. How awesome is that? We don’t have Bellana’s schedule yet, but they go to the same school so she’s off school next week too. The question is, will she be off work too. However the cookie ends up crumbling, it’s going to be awesome to see the kids. I can’t wait.

Sunday, five days from now, will see the final episode of The Walking Dead on the air. I watched the second to last episode while doing my exercise yesterday. I was hoping my favorite zombie podcast would release it’s recap episode today, because it always releases on Tuesday, but nothing yet. The only Walking Dead podcast I have in my feed is two guys who constantly bitch about how they don’t like the show anymore. Why do I bother following them?

Did I mention that I’ve shot a little film over the last week or two? I took dad’s camera with a roll of cheap black and white film around town last weekend, and then this weekend I figured I was going to get to the church early for the funeral so I brought it with me and took a couple of exterior church shots for happy thoughts. I think I have 9-10 shots left on the roll. Where should I shoot next? When should I shoot next? It was 25 degrees out this morning so methinks the days of going out before work are probably over for a while.

Okay. lunch is wrapping up. Time to get back to work.

Good day.

Off Track Morning

I threw off my morning routine before I even went to sleep last night. I forgot to start the dishwasher. The little blender I use to mix my protein shakes was in the dishwasher. That means I couldn’t have half a shake like I’ve done every morning for the last two weeks.

To further the fails, I started doing my 45 minute trotting in place thing. After 30 minutes I stopped. I did the 5k, I did the whole exercise ring. I did not finish the calorie ring and I did not hit the five miles. I had actually told Jen this morning that I was going to close the exercise ring by walking over the weekend because my legs are hurting and I thought they could use a break. I decided on the fly today to start that break a smidge early.

Changing the subject, I’m saving this for later. It’s my Aunt’s obituary. I’ve already saved off the service information somewhere else, but I want to keep it all here too just in case.

Change of subject again, it is Friday. I could really use an easy day today. Fingers crossed. Happy Friday, everyone. It is also Veteran’s Day. I tip my hat in thanks to all who served and serve. It’s also a date that can function as a math problem. 11/11/22. 11+11=22. Get it?

I Don’t Recognize Myself

Most of yesterday sucked. So far today has been better. I had one mile on my faux jog that had a much slower time than the other four. I only needed about 46.5 minutes to get to 1000 calories. That’s not as good as Tuesday’s 45, but it’s tons better than yesterday’s 60. I think if I stay in one place the numbers line up. If I move around a little, like say from my one jogging spot to my desk and back, then the numbers get screwy.

I also rebelled against the scale. After only losing 0.4 pounds over five days I broke my rule and stepped on the scale again. I was down a pound from yesterday. Sounds like a karmic adjustment of some kind. It made me feel a smidge better. I didn’t log it. It wasn’t an official weigh in, but it did lessen my self-pissyness. A little at least.

After this morning’s little trot, my legs feel a little like rubber. Walking in place used to make me feel that way. It doesn’t anymore. That’s a good thing, right? Right. How long before faux running in place isn’t enough to get the heart rate up? What’s going to be next?

One other item to note on the post-surgery subject. I’ve been experimenting with something for the last day or two. I have been testing myself by eating meals without the stopwatch running. I doubt I’ve been waiting 30 seconds between bites but so far I haven’t had any issues. That 30 second rule was something I put in place, not something that I was told to do. At first they suggested 15-20 seconds and I just bumped it up to 30 out of fear. If I find myself getting nauseous during meals I’ll use the clock again, but so far I have been okay. We’ll see how it goes.

Right then. Time to punch in to work. Happy Thursday, folks.

Week 27 – Worst Weigh In Ever

Everything has sucked this morning. Almost everything. The election in Massachusetts went well, as if there had been any doubt. Today’s new episode of Star Wars Andor was absolutely fucking amazing. Kenneth Branagh in Henry V. That nazi piece of filth Mel Gibson in Braveheart. Now add Andy effin’ Serkis to the list of amazing inspirational speeches before a battle, fictional or historical fictional or otherwise. Holy shit that episode was giving me chills, and I am secure enough in my masculinity to say that I may have teared up a little. Damn!

Star Wars not withstanding, everything else has sucked today. I have said the last few weeks that I was waiting for a weigh in that leveled off. It came today. I am down, but only 0.4 pounds. It’s only been five days since the last weigh in so I should really get over myself and take it as the plus that I know it is, but for some reason it just pissed me off. I have been feeling like I was slipping into a really shitty bad mood for the last day or so and seeing the scale pushed me over the bad mood edge. It’s completely irrational but it’s true.

Exercise made it worse. For the last few days I’ve been running in place and going five miles in about 42 minutes. Today the same exercise needed 60 minutes to hit five miles. Why? My first mile pace was normal. The second was a little slower than normal. I don’t know why. The third was normal. The fourth was double normal. The fifth was also double normal. What the fuck?

So now here I am in a full blown shitty headspace. Maybe I’ll just watch Andor again and see if it helps.

Addendum: I should also add that another reason I was falling into a pissy mood was this blog had the worst day stats-wise that it has had in over four years. I had less than a fifth of my normal hits. That shouldn’t effect my mood at all because this page is completely and totally pointless, but it did so there you go.