(Non) Daily Haiku for You #139

Today’s haiku for you is undead……

Zombies are hungry,
But feeding them is stressful.
Does my brain taste good?

So I watched an episode of The Walking Dead last night. Season two episode seven, titled Pretty Much Dead Already. That is the episode that changed my opinion on the show from “I think I like this show” to “holy shit I can never miss an episode of this show ever.” To say it’s a good episode is a massive understatement. If you were to say it was one of the best hours of television ever aired then I probably would not 100% agree with you, but I would understand where you are coming from.

I wrote the above haiku during my lunch break today. Watch a great zombie episode on Monday night, write a zombie haiku on Tuesday afternoon. Makes sense, right?

I then thought it would be funny to ask the wordpress.com AI Assistant to “write a haiku about zombies.” Allow me to share the results the AI came up with:

Hungry Zombies Haiku

Zombies are hungry,
But feeding them is stressful.
Does my brain taste good?

Yes, kids. You are reading that correctly. It gave me the same haiku that I just wrote! What the hell, bro? I hadn’t even published it yet! The AI Assistant literally read the document I was working in and stole my haiku! What the fuck?

Okay… I am going to ask for another one. This time I will ask it to “write a different haiku about zombies.” Here’s the result:

Zombies in the night,
Moaning for flesh and delight.
Fear their endless plight.

Oh nice, it rhymes this time. Think it did that as an apology? Neither do I. What a jerk! What an artificially intelligent ass wipe!

I wonder… did the AI Assistant somehow misinterpret my initial request for a haiku as a request to format my current post? Something like that? It added the title. I centered the text myself after the fact. I wonder if it thought I wanted input on the text I had already written. I’m not sure. I did specifically ask for a haiku, but I did not ask for a new haiku. Who knows. The AI is a jerk either way. A plagiarizing, haiku stealing thief of a jerk.

If the second AI haiku was not stolen from me… where did the AI Assistant steal it from? I’m sure it just went to google and spit out the first zombie themed haiku it found.

Meet the New Stress, Same as the Old Stress

I wrote a little yesterday evening about getting stressed out at work over something that didn’t deserve to be stressed out over. It happens now and then, you know? It’s work.

I was working on a project yesterday and this morning I reviewed it with the person I submitted it to and it was fine. No problem. Helpful. It did what it needed to do. All is well. Nice, huh?

Unfortunately, 60% of my group is out either on vacation or sick today. We are going to be seriously short handed. Oh good! Hello, work stress. Nice to see you again, my old friend.

Heh, what can you do, right? Just roll with it, babie.

Complain

Bloganuary writing prompt
What do you complain about the most?
View all responses

I complain about a lot of things. I will give you a list and you will see that the things I complain about the most all boil down to pretty much one thing.

  • Fascists and fascism
  • Nazis and nazi-ism
  • Maga
  • Trump and trump supporters and trump sympathizers and trump collaberators
  • Americans whose words and actions are anti-american and anti-democracy
  • Insurectionists
  • Treasonists
  • Anyone who helped or supported or sympathized with the attempt to overthrow the democratically elected president on January 6, 2021
  • Anti-science
  • Anti-vax
  • Anti-evolution
  • Climate change deniers
  • Misogynists and/or incels
  • Bigots
  • Qanon
  • People who abuse children
  • People who abuse their spouses

You see the trend there? That’s the serious list. That’s the real response to the question. Now I’ll give another, shorter (I hope) list that’s more sarcastic and more in the spirit of kidding around and lowering whatever tension I just built up with my real list.

  • People who drive too slow in the fast lane on the highway
  • Winter weather
  • Traffic jams
  • Morning commutes
  • Evening commutes
  • Country music
  • Television commercials, especially the ones that pimp drugs with awful side effects
  • Did I mention snow?
  • Websites that autoplay video, especially when the audio is not muted
  • The New York Yankees or the Montreal Canadians

There… that’s a good lighten-the-mood kinda list… though I should probably delete it and let the serious list stand on it’s own. I feel a bit like a coward leaving the second list, but what can you do, right?

Stressed Out

I got really stressed out over work this afternoon. I am not sure why. The project I was working on did not warrant that level of stress at all, but for some reason it really got to me. Weird.

I was afraid I would be working all night tonight but I think I got it wrapped up enough that I am all set, and there are still four whole minutes left in my shift.

Last night Jen had a great idea. She suggested we watch a Star Wars movie. I am always up for that! First she said she wanted to watch The Force Awakens. Then she changed her mind and suggested The Phantom Menace. That was odd. One really only ever watches Episode One when they then plan to watch all of the movies in order. Was that what she wanted to do? Why yes, yes it was. Wicked! Epic! Awesome! I asked if a rewatch would include Solo and Rogue One and she said yes! Wicked! Epic! Awesome! 

Now that I won’t I will not be working all night tonight (at least I don’t think I will be working all night), we can move on to Episode Two: Attack of the Clones. Another one that is generally only viewed as part of a wicked epic awesome full rewatch. I’m so ready!

Picturesque Winter Crap

I hate snow. Even when we only get an inch or so like we did last night, I hate it. I even hate it when it makes everything look all pretty and picturesque and winter wonderlandy like this morning. I just hate snow!

151/365
151/365
DSC_2251
DSC_2250

Hey snow, I got your winter wonderland right here. Jerk.

My Favorite Sports

Bloganuary writing prompt
What are your favorite sports to watch and play?
View all responses

There was a time…

There was a time when my social life more or less consisted of watching sports. I’d say 50-60% of what I did with my free time involved watching sports. There was a period in my life where I had a partial season ticket package (10 games) for the Boston Bruins of the National Hockey League, a full season ticket package (40 games) for the Lowell Lock Monsters of the American Hockey League, and then during the summer we split a full season ticket package for the Lowell Spinners of the New York Penn baseball league (I think it was about 50 games and we went to half of them). At the same time I used to follow the Lock Monsters on road games because there were six AHL teams in New England. I would go to road games in three of the other five locations. Along with all of that, there were playoff games for the Bruins and the Monsters. One AHL season saw me go to maybe 50-55 games. Crazy.

Now? I still follow hockey and baseball closely, but I rarely go to games in person, and I have a tough time fitting actually sitting and watching games on television, or listening on the radio, into my busy schedule. I still hang on every goal and every run, but I miss tons and tons of every season. 

So the answer to the question, what are my favorite sports to watch? Hockey and Baseball. The Boston Bruins of the National Hockey League, and the Boston Red Sox of Major League Baseball. Those are my favorite teams. I also follow some NCAA hockey but my old school, UMass Lowell, is seriously crappy this year so they are tough to follow. There is a minor league baseball team in Manchester New Hampshire, the New Hampshire Fisher Cats who are in the Toronto Blue Jays system, but I haven’t been to a game there since 2007. This year I am hoping to get to a game and maybe follow them on the radio a little bit. We will see.

No Call Part 2
Boston Bruins vs Calgary Flames, October 19, 2006
352
Boston Red Sox vs Texas Rangers, June 30, 2007