Month: July 2021

I’m not Good at This

Today was a bad day. Nothing bad actually happened yet everything felt like it was bad. What’s the opposite of rose colored glasses?

Whatever. Tomorrow we are going to see Bellana so that should help my spirits for a while. I can’t wait to see her. I’m so proud of her. We aren’t going to see much of Harry this week but it looks like we might be able to squeak in some time. This was a dad weekend so we haven’t seen him since Friday morning. I can’t wait to see him. I’m so proud of him.

Did I somehow change font size between the first two paragraphs or are my eyes just having a rough day like the rest of me?

Speaking of going blind, my new glasses are ready!

Well folks, it’s getting time for bed. I, your humble narrator, will talk to you again tomorrow. Goodnight, moon.

Family Feud

The fuck?

My mother has Family Feud on the television right now. I’m not sure if she’s actually watching it, but it’s on.

I can’t see the TV but I can hear it. They were just at the end of an episode in the bonus money round, or whatever the hell they call it. One of the questions was, “how long is Harry Potter’s magic wand?”

First of all… magic wand? No. Screw you. It’s wand, not magic wand. What do you think this is, some stupid abracadabra story? Fuck you.

I didn’t hear what the first player gave as an answer. The second player said 12 inches. Moron. Then they gave the scores and the player got a good total off of the question. Uh uh, no way. Then Steve Harvey said that 12 inches was the number one answer.

Well fuck you right in your stupid fuck you. 12 inches? No. Everyone knows that Harry Potter’s wand is 11 inches long. ELEVEN INCHES. Not 12. Morons. It’s bad enough that the contestant said 12, but to learn that most of the people surveyed said 12 too?

I don’t want to live on this planet anymore. Fucking death eater sympathizers. There’s no hope for us.

Come On, Tomorrow

Come on, tomorrow. Let’s get you here now!

I’m off work tomorrow. We’re having a step daughter visit and I can’t friggin’ wait. Literally everything is getting under my skin and rubbing me the wrong way today. Everything. My parents phone has been ringing off the hook and every single ring makes me want to flush the phone down the fucking toilet. At work, I have a big thing I’m trying to finish before my day off and I can’t because every few minutes there is another big thing. I want to delegate it out to the group, like a good supervisor should, but everyone in the group is already on something huge. I’ve been at my parents house for 31 hours now and I’ve got another 4-5 hours to go but it feels like it’s never going to end.

Earlier I fantasized about digging a hole and screaming into it. Now I am fantasizing about digging a hole and burying myself in it. Argh!

Other nitpicky things:

  • The podcast app on my iPad has crashed twice since lunch started
  • I got six hours of sleep last night which was more than the night before and I’m starting to run out of gas
  • Why does the meals delivery ring the doorbell just as I am getting into a meeting
  • Why is the meals delivery delivering two meals now
  • Are we really going to have rain every day this month
    • I overheard my mother listening to the news yesterday and they said that while there has not been measurable rainfall every day in July so far, there has been recorded rain drops hitting Logan Airport every day in July. I guess that means the record books do not show a full month (so far) of rain, but technically there has been. Whatever, this blows.
  • There are four lightbulbs in the light fixture in this room. Two of them are out. We don’t have replacements.
  • I do not enjoy being within ear shot of The Game Show Network all day (though I used to work in a building that used to be The Game Show Network’s headquarters, or so I’ve heard) it is way better than Jerry Friggin’ Springer reruns.

The fucking house phone has rung twice while I typed this post.

Screaming.

All of the screaming.

Scream

Where is a good place for me to go where I can just scream and scream and scream until it all goes away? I could just do it at the dining room table, but that would freak everyone around me out. I don’t want to do that. I could do it in the woods behind my house but that might freak out the neighbors. I could do it in the car, but it will probably be loud enough to freak out the other drivers.

It’s a conundrum, indeed.

Granted I am just about to the point where I am not going to be able to stop myself and I’m just going to start screaming… and I am not 100% sure I’ll be able to stop once I start.

You know how it is, right? Maybe I could dig a hole somewhere and scream into it. I could scream into the void, but there’s never a void around when you need one.

To paraphrase a Woody Allen joke from before we suspected he was a child molesting scumbag piece of crap…

Character #1: I feel a void at the center of my being.
Character #2: What kind of void?
Character #1: Well, an empty void.

17 Years

17 years ago today I, along with about 20 other people, showed up to my first day of work at the company I still work for. I was 33 years old and was pretty sure I was the oldest person in the group. I sat in the back and kept to myself and learned as much as I could to make myself ready for my first real job. Months later I learned that the rest of the group thought of me as the old guy. If they thought I was old then, what must they think of me now? Woah!

Nothing else to really say about it. I’m having a busy and frustrating day at work. I wish I was at home instead of at my parents house. That’s neither here nor there though (see what I did there? Geography puns are where it’s at).

It is currently 1:44pm and I am kinda ready for bed. I want to go home but I can’t and maybe that’s why I am extra fatigued. Mental stress on top of physical fatigue? Something like that.

Anyway, happy workaversary to the few folks from my new hire group who are still around. Thumbs up, folks.

Oh Look, It’s Raning AGain

I am so sick of rain. So sick of rain. So sick of rain.

I’m sure there have been days this month that didn’t rain, but there has been so much of it that I can’t remember a time in human history when it didn’t rain a least a few minutes a day. It just never stops. We went out last night with one of Jen’s coworkers and his wife and we were supposed to sit outside like good Covid-19 fighters, but no. It rained. Of course it rained. Last night while we slept it poured. It’s pouring out now. I had to be at my mother’s house by 7:00am for an extended nana sitting (7:00am Monday to around 6:30-7:00pm Tuesday… yikes) but before I could leave I had to wet-vac up the latest day’s worth of cellar puddle after the latest round of rain.

I am so sick of rain.

Once We Got Home

We went out tonight. It was terrifying and wonderful at the same time. That’s not what this post is about though.

I put rhythm guitar onto two songs and leads onto another. I now have two songs ready to mix. Sweet.