The Empty Lunch Break Post

My lunch break is ending. Time to throw up a post.

I got nothing.

Nothing at all.

The last three days have felt like the longest six months ever, har har har.

Jen asked me a question about a Lizardfish show from a few years ago. I had to go to the Lizardfish website to get the details she wanted. Turns out the domain has expired. Did I know that? I think I did. lizardfishmusic.com is no longer a thing. Lizardfishmusic.wordpress.com is though. Turns out I never added the 2/1/20 show to the list of past shows. There’s a post for it, but I never took the next step and added it to the list. I’ll fix that. While I was there I took a second to add a new post saying that we’re missing it. Because we are.

My back is killing me. My neck is killing me. My shoulders are killing me. My legs are killing me. My feet are killing me……. and I still have 28 minutes of exercise to do today. Yikes!

We are planning a drive up to Vermont to check in with the kids and deliver some seasonal clothing. The closer we get to the weekend the more excited about it I get. I’m really looking forward to it, even if it requires me to do a shit ton of laundry. Can’t wait.

See? I had nothing to talk about.

A Downside of Weekend Work

So there is a hidden downside to working around the clock over the weekend.

There are a bunch of podcasts that I like to listen to during the work week that release new episodes over the weekend. This week I’ve listened to all of them. Now I have nothing to listen to during my actual work shift tomorrow.

Bummer, dude.

Unrelated to work, there was good news today. First, we got to see Bellana for about five minutes. She was passing through town and stopped in to say hello. Second, we had a FaceTime call with Harry! Both kids on a random Sunday! If only I had had a chance to shower and change out of yesterday’s clothes! Also, if I don’t get a haircut soon my head is going to collapse under it’s own weight. Keep an eye on the news. The headline will likely be, “Red Head’s Head Implodes. News at 11:00.”

Sad Calendar

We had an event on our Google Calendars showing the custody schedule for the kids. Our weekends were marked Kid weekends. Dad’s weekends were not marked. We could look as far into the future as we needed to and instantly know when we had the kids.

Jen just canceled the event.

We don’t need it anymore. When they come home for visits we will work out who gets them when on a case by case basis. In general though… we don’t need that calendar event anymore…

…and it makes me super sad.

Pills

It’s 10:37am. Did you miss me? I usually have a morning hello post hours earlier than this.

What kept me?

Pills. Yeah, man.

No, seriously. I just filled my parents’ pill caddies for the week. There was a lot of back and forth with my brother and sister. There are pharmacy changes coming in the near future and it’s affecting how we go about filling prescriptions and two of my mother’s 10000000 scripts need to be refilled this week because there aren’t enough pills to get us through to next week. Their primary care physician (who is also my primary care physician) is on the case though. All is well.

The bathroom is the other issue today. Not in an accident way, just in a there-is-only-one-in-the-house way. It seems like every time someone needs to go really bad there is someone already in there. I’ve been toilet blocked twice today, and I toilet blocked someone else once. It’s minor chaos.

My mother just shuffled into the room and asked me if I was her son and did she actually give birth to me.

I want to go home so badly I cannot put it into words. I am so tired of neglecting my family in favor of my family, you know? I was afraid to text Harry last night but Jen let me know that he was texting her, so I snuck in a couple. It’s only been one day and I miss him so much, and missing him makes me miss Bellana even more, and missing them both makes me so upset that I am here and not with Jen because I know she feels the same way, and it’s just crushing me so much I can’t even punctuate a sentence properly and I keep writing these endless run on things that when I go back to read these at some hypothetical point in the future are going to piss me off and now I am just doing it just because I am pissed off and I want my future self to also be pissed off at my grammar shenanigans and this is stupid and I am so miserable right now I can’t deal.

I think I am going to go upstairs and try to take apart a twin bed. No reason.

Fuck.

Miserable

When I left my son today he was on the verge of tears. When I left my wife today she had just finished crying.

Now where am I when the people I care about most need me? I’m at my parents house for 24 hours, that’s where.

I am the worst parent, step or otherwise, in the universe.
I am the worst husband in the universe.
I am the worst person in the universe.

The Caravan is Rolling

Well folks, here we are. The caravan is rolling. I checked Find My on my iPhone and it shows me that Harry is traveling north on route 89. The plan was for him and his dad to leave a couple of hours ahead of us so we don’t all get stuck in the dorm room together. Covid, ya know?

We should be leaving in a moment (though I just remembered I forgot to do something for work at the end of the day yesterday and I need to do that. It’ll only take 2 minutes).

We can’t deny it anymore. We gots two college kids now.

I am so excited for him and so proud of him and I think I might explode.

It Begins

Harry is spending the night at his father’s house tonight. He just left a few minutes ago. Our nest is officially empty. I know we’re going to see him tomorrow when we help him move in, and we’re going to see Bellana too, but…

…is it Christmas break yet?

Today’s Going to be an Emotional Day

Today is likely to be a little emotional. Tomorrow is going to be much more emotional. After that, it’s all down hill for a while.

Today is our last full day with Harry. Tomorrow we move him into his dorm.

Yeah… Robbie, your humble narrator, (who is already an emotional wreck for parental reasons) is going to be even more of an emotional wreck than usual.

You, faithful reader, have been warned.