I don’t like being out in public like this. Never mind the part about asking someone to rewire my innards.
Turns out I’ve been here before. I went to an info session once years ago and then chickened out before my first appointment. This is the same office.
I’m experimenting with double masking. I can’t tell if the inner mask is still over my nose or not. I think it is.
Another missed car music opportunity today. I actually have time to go, I just don’t want to. I’m more focused on my weight loss surgery non-appointment. I thought it was at Lowell General Hospital, but it’s actually in Chelmsford. No worries. I have the address, I just didn’t look at it before. Fear, ya know?
I don’t know the timeline for this process. In my tiny little brain I assumed it was about a year. I hope it’s at least a little less than that. Jen thought she heard it was about six months. That would be okay with me. With fingers crossed and knocking on all of the wood I say that we are hoping the pandemic will let us to go Disney World next January. I need to either be through the surgery and recovered and back on my feet again by then, or I need to hold off until we get back.
There is also the question of whether or not the pandemic bitch will cause the hospital to stop doing elective surgery. I know some hospitals are in that boat right now. Hopefully that doesn’t become an issue.
Sorry for all of these posts. It’s just kind of what’s on my mind right now. I’m hoping we’ll get through it together, right?
I filled out the paperwork that I need to drop off at my weight loss surgery check in non-appointment tomorrow. There was a medical history form and a psychological questionnaire.
The psych form had my favorite question. There was a little section on alcohol consumption. Do you drink alcohol? No. Never have, likely never will. Then there were a few questions that assume you answered yes. I just answer no to all of them.
But then…
Do other people ever complain about your drinking, yes or no.
Well that one gave me pause. Obviously no one has ever complained about my drinking, but I have in fact taken truck loads of shit over my not drinking. I have taken so much shit, you wouldn’t think the world could hold that much shit. I should answer yes just out of spite!
I answered no.
I failed to get out of bed early enough to go out for some car music today. It’s been a while. I need to keep on this. I want the re-recordings done before RPM starts on February 1st. Get on it, fat boy!
My hair is so long that it keeps covering my glasses. When I am wearing my sit-at-the-computer glasses and I have to look somewhere else, I try to look over the top of my glasses. I can’t do that today because there is 20 pounds of hair sitting there. I keep thinking my glasses are dirty because there’s smutz on them. The smutz, as you can probably guess, is actually my hair. If I don’t get my hair cut tomorrow I am going to lose my shit. At the same time, I really don’t want to get my hair cut tomorrow because I really don’t want Covid. Damn it!
Yesterday was Dr Martin Luther King, Jr day in the USA. Was it also a holiday in the UK? Why is the That Pedal Show live show happening today instead of yesterday?
I just did something I haven’t done in ages. Instead of chasing my lunch with some junk food, I had some fruit. I am sharing that information not because it’s interesting to you, my loyal and much loved readers, but because if I happen to look back at this a few days or weeks or years from now I want to know that on at least one day I did at least one thing right. I am encouraging/guilting my hypothetical future self.
My step son is taking a jazz piano course. Just a one credit thing. He had his first lesson today. He’s very excited. He said he popped a 9th on top of a Dominat 7 chord. Yes. Next stop, Chick Effin’ Corea babie!
Right, back to work.
I think I hit the caffeine a little too hard today. It’s quarter to 11:00pm and I can’t sleep. I haven’t tried very hard. I’m just bright eyed and bushy tailed. I’m hoping for some car music tomorrow so a good nights sleep would be helpful. Nope. Doesn’t seem to be in the cards. Oh well.
I started watching The Peacemaker last night. It’s every bit of the foul, goofy, raunchy, goodness you’d expect from a spin off of The Suicide Squad. I started watching Yellowjackets tonight. I’ve been seeing people raving about it all over the social media universe (except for that one platform, right?) and after one episode it’s already living up to the hype. I mean, what the hell???
We re-potted the three bedroom plants last night and I watered them today. I don’t think I killed them, but knowing my gardening skills they are probably at death’s door. Sorry, bros.
I mentioned the doctor visit I have on Wednesday. Also on the agenda is a haircut, I think. We know I’m freaking out over the weight loss surgery process, but I’m also freaking out about Covid exposure. Two vaccine shots, a booster, and a kick ass mask should be enough to keep me safe, but in these insane omicron times? Who knows. If I do get it, the three shots should keep it from getting out of control, but with my weight?
No, Robert. Stay optimistic. Focus on the power of positive thinking and all of that crap.
Okay, I think I’m going to head over to the YouTubes and watch some guitar videos. Mr Dumble (I don’t know his name), the man behind Dumble amplifiers has apparently passed away. Maybe I’ll look his amps up. If I find something good I’ll share it.
Imminent… did I spell that right? I think so. It’s one of those words, you know? One of those words that I am never quite sure how to spell.
What was I talking about? Oh yeah, the panic is imminent.
Tomorrow is Tuesday. After that… Wednesday. That’s when the panic will come full force. Wednesday morning. At Lowell General Hospital. It’s not even an appointment, it’s just handing in some paperwork and having my vitals recorded. The actual first appointment is February 3rd via Zoom. Wednesday though… that’s the next step. I have to get through that before I can do anything else.
Weight loss surgery. I am in a state of mild freak out right now. It will be a major league freak out tomorrow. Wednesday morning… full blown panic. I can practically smell it.
I’m doing it this time. No more wussing out like the last time. No more giving in to fear. No more worrying about what I won’t be able to do anymore once it’s done. The only worry worth worrying about is what happens if I don’t do it.
It’s the right thing to do, but I am still going to panic over every little detail, including dropping off the medical history forms on Wednesday.
Fuck. I don’t know if I am ready for this.
Fuck. I have to get myself ready for this.
Fuck.
When the pandemic started I declared that I was still going to get up at the same time each workday morning that I did before the company sent us home. That means I would have to be up and ready to go out the door by 7:30am.
I stuck to that for a while but eventually the snooze bar started getting pressed an extra time or two. Today I got out of bed at 7:00am. Last week there was a 7:15 and a nearly 7:30. Soooo. Nope, not sticking to that particular lock down promise to myself.
Today is the day that my company is trying to reopen the buildings. This is their second attempt. The first was last summer. We’re going hybrid so we are only supposed to be going into the office a small percentage of the time. Last week they gave us the option of delaying our come back to February 1st if we were worried about Omicron. Am I worried about Omicron? You bet your viral ass I am. So I won’t be going back today.
Still, with the hybrid return on its way I should really try to start getting out of bed earlier again. It would be the smart move. I should really do it. Will I do it? No, probably not.
Friday. Lunch break. My Covid hair is so long right now that it’s actually giving me a headache. Is that even possible? I’m looking at Wednesday as the day I get it cut. I am going to look and feel like a different person. It’s going to be weird.
Wednesday is also the first step in the weight loss surgery process. I’m just going in to have my vitals taken. Safe to assume I will crush the scale when they weigh me. My back has become such a problem that I can’t really exercise at the moment. It is going to be a really tough time for me but if I don’t do it I am going to die of fat. It’s that simple.
Bellana and her roommate just posted a video to YouTube detailing their journey to The Netherlands and their first couple of days in quarantine. I really want to post it here but I don’t know if I should. I want to though.
Harry just came home. He’s been working for one of the gig-economy internets services. Two customers stiffed him on tips. They both suck. Actually, I don’t know that for sure, they could just be going through tough financial times, but they did stiff my kid so I am mad at them. At least he’s home. He’s planning on going out again at dinner and we will miss him. He’s going back to school on Sunday and I don’t want him to go, but I do want him to go, but I don’t want him to go. Aw, crud.
Bellana and Kenny’s YouTube post is giving a tour of their apartment. The views of the city are amazing. I want to just watch it over and over but I have to go back to work. Blah. Three hours and nine minutes to go.
Last night, just before I was about to turn in for the night, I had a muscle spasm, or a cramp, or something in my gut that hurt like it hurts when a meteor crashes into your face. Oh my goodness, did that little sucker (whatever it was) hurt like 10 shades of hellish suck.
I’ve had this happen 2-3 times over the past 10-15 years and each time it is about 5-10 minutes of nightmare*. I don’t know what to do to relieve the pain so I get up and try to walk it off. That doesn’t help at all, but at least I am doing something. After a few minutes the pain calms down but whatever muscle is being the asshole is still twitching. Just as I start thinking I might be okay it fires up again and the whole thing starts over. After that it’s done. Last night the whole thing lasted less than 10 minutes and then I was able to lie down and sleep.
So that’s the first sign that today might suck. Here’s the second.
Last night I wrote a post saying that it was going to be horribly cold out this morning. The forecast was right. It is currently six degrees out. I should be happy that I put the barrels out last night and don’t need to go outside today, right?
We got a dusting of snow overnight. We have a grocery delivery coming this morning. I need to put ice melt down so the instacart person doesn’t slip. After all that shit last night, I still have to go outside this morning.
Here’s hoping that’s the last bad thing and that the rest of the day goes smoothly. Pretty please with sugar on top.
*That sentence is my attempt to use the most “-” characters in a single sentence ever. Did I set a new world record? Do we need to call the Guinness folks?
It’s almost half past noon and I haven’t posted anything yet? What’s wrong? Did Robbie fall down a well? Did I go into the witness protection program? Did someone tell me that you can catch Covid from wordpress.com so I locked it down?
Nope. Just busy.
I paid that dude $20 to shovel the driveway and, while it was money well spent and I would do it again, the dude did a pretty crummy job. That plus the additional snow that fell after he left means I had to shovel everything again. It’s all done, but my back doesn’t work anymore and the pain is borderline shocking.
Sooooooo I think I am going to sit here at the alternate desk in Jen’s office for a while. Ho hum.
I’ve been able to work on a little music between last night and today so far. I did some drums and bass stuff on two re-recordings. I hope to play some guitar tonight and do some car singing in the morning. I have one song ready to mix as well, so maybe I’ll get to that today? Who knows. It all depends on the pain level.
I still need to mop the kitchen floor, and there is a grocery delivery coming that I’ll need to put away. The rest of the day will be sitting here trying not to let my spine fall off.
Yippee!
Inside the Red Head's Head 