Category: Generic

Old Fart Moment

I had a serious middle aged old fart moment today.

I was sitting at my desk, eating my lunch, and a thought popped into my head. I finished the laundry. All of the laundry in the house is washed, dried, and folded (though there’s some that still needs to be put away).

I thought to myself… all the laundry is done… that is awesome.

Then I thought, if my 16 year old self heard me say that the laundry being done is “awesome” he would probably kick me in the balls so hard that they’d end up a geosynchronous orbit.

Robert, you are such an old person. Old. Person.

I have to be careful not to let my 16 year old self know how happy I was after I made the bed this morning. Who knows what violence he would befall upon me.

Remember That Thing?

Hey, remember when I used to post about writing shitty songs all the time? The Red Sox have totally distracted me from all of that.

I need to write at least one song this month and tonight in my baseball induced misery I wrote the melody and the lyrics for a new song. Aren’t you proud of me? Aren’t you sad that I’m posting about shitty music again? Yeah, sorry about that.

Car music in the morning?

When I sat down to write this literary masterpiece of a blog post I put the Bruins game on the radio. They were losing to Philly, 4-3 in the third. Almost immediately after I started listening, Philly scored to pad the lead to 5-3.

Sports wise, this is just not my night.

Splash

That sound you are hearing is all of Red Sox Nation catapulting themselves into the Charles river out of depression and anguish as the Astros score five runs in the top of the sixth.

6-0 Astros. I think. It may be more. I can’t hear the radio over the roar of everyone crying and throwing temper tantrums and just giving up on everything they hold dear in their lives.

Patches Needs the Bats to Wake Up

The Red Sox are hitless through four. They are coming up in the bottom of the fifth now. Patches has a good feeling that this is the inning the bats wake up.

They are trailing 1-0 in a game they have to win.

Come on Red Sox.

Heading to the Ninth

The game is tied at two heading into the top of the ninth. Houston tied it with a solo home run in the eighth. The Red Sox have left 984632 runners on base so far.

Sincerely hoping for a walk off, but we have to get three outs first. Come on Red Sox!

Five Innings Down

At least I’ve stayed awake longer than I did yesterday. One full inning and counting.

After five innings the Red Sox are still hanging on to a 2-1 lead over the Astros. Similar to game one, the Sox are leaving a lot of runners on base. We need a little more clutch. We can’t let Houston hang in close.