Tag: South Park

Back Yard Guest

This cat has been hanging around all afternoon.

Obligatory South Park quotes:

  • “Something went wrong. And the turkeys broke free. And the worst part is .they’re really pissed off.” Dr. Alphonse Mephesto
  • “Wow, those are some pissed off turkeys!”
  • “These fudged up turkeys from the crustaceous era can take our lives, but they can never take our FREEDOM!” Chef
  • “Every turkey dies, not every turkey truly lives.” Chef

Amazing Advances in Topical Creams

Yesterday’s haiku mentioned that I feel like I have a black eye. I don’t have a black eye though. It’s just swollen and sore. What’s going on?

I might have a guess. I made a doctors appointment for afterwork tonight to see if my guess is correct. If it is, then we’re going to have to keep me away from Worcestershire sauce* for a while. Fortunately there have been some amazing advances in topical creams, so I should be okay if the worst is true.

My question for the doctor… do I have… Pink Eye?

*This whole post is a reference to the first South Park Halloween episode. If you don’t get the references then I apologize for your lack of culture. That first Halloween episode is one of the finest 30 minute television time slots in broadcast/cable/streaming history. It is perfection.

Picard Rewatch

I got shit done on the RPM Challenge today, but on the plus side we got this week’s episode of The Last of Us two days early and it was freaking incredible.

Also, I just finished season one of Star Trek Picard, and I’m 7.5 minutes into season two. Will I finish before season three starts on Thursday? We’ll see.

Once the Picard rewatch is done I need to rewatch The Mandalorian before season three launches on March 1st. There is also new South Park, and each episode of The Last of Us requires multiple viewings (the show is that good) and I’ve got a couple of seasons (I think) of Star Trek Discovery still to go, as well as the last season of The Orville, and The Flash just kicked off it’s final season.

As far as TV is concerned, there’s a lot of good stuff to take in. The 10 episodes of Picard season two come first though.

Geddy Alex and Primus

This is wonderful. Geddy Lee and Alex Lifeson on stage together for the first time since 2015.

Comedy Central is going to air this show soon, and Paramount+ will stream it after that. I’ll watch it a few thousand times once it’s out.

Effin’ Facebook / Effin’ FoMO

Damn it. Every time I think I’m out, they pull me back in!

It’s been two weeks since I visited Facebook. I wasn’t even thinking about it. Not being there was seriously becoming second nature and I was liking it. The ban/boycott, whatever we call it, was becoming less of a thing and more of a normal.

Then they sent me a friggin’ email. I’m pretty sure I marked Facebook notification emails as spam, yet they still come through. It said there were 18 notifications. No sweat. It said there were three friend requests. WhatWhatWhat? Fear of Missing Out officially triggered.

I mean, let’s be honest here… they are all going to be porn spam. That’s a given, isn’t it? We all know that. I don’t get a lot of that shit at Facebook, but given that I haven’t interacted with anyone in weeks it feels like a great big pornographic red flag.

I don’t know though… there’s a big part of me that really wants to log in and see who the friend requests are from. There is a big part of me that also wants to stay away. I am conflicted. I am in social media conflict.

Fuck you, Facebook. Fuck you right in your fucking eye*.

*I don’t think you need to actually see The Book of Mormon to appreciate its brilliance. You just have to listen to the soundtrack. If you do that, you’ll get the reference.

ADDENDUM: I caved. I looked. They were all spam. FoMO. I didn’t look at anything in my time line, I only looked at the notifications. So yeah I was there, but no I didn’t actually put myself into a real position to get sucked into anything. Well… just being there is risking getting sucked in, but I think you know what I mean. FoMO won today, but it’s been reset to zero again. For now.

As the World Continues to Fall Apart

When did Disney World become my personal Covid canary in the coalmine? I don’t know, but what I do know is that they have reinstituted their indoor mask requirement regardless of vaccination status.

Yippee. Why is this necessary? Because half the people in this country are fucking garbage who have no concern for their fellow citizens. That’s why. They make up 100 fake reasons for not getting vaccinated that all boil down to a simple I-don’t-wanna-be-inconvenienced. Fuck them. Fuck them in their eye and then fuck them in their other eye.*

Today is my parents’ 54th anniversary. My sister was able to take my mother in to the rehab hospital to see my father. I’m sure that helped both of their mental states. You know what else would help their mental states? Everyone getting vaccinated and stop being little spoiled fucking brats.

I wasn’t planning on writing a pissed off post about the slime living in my country. I’m just feeling angry about it all. Angry enough that I completely forgot what I was planning to write about.

Get the fucking vaccine, you fucking mental midgets.

*Thank you to South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone for that little nugget from their musical, The Book of Mormon. Sometimes a phrase just fits the occasion, you know?

The Stir Crazy Files – Episode 78: Tone Deaf

I might have snapped… finally.

This morning as we were getting ready for work Jen made an off hand comment about the health of one of the plants in the bedroom. She said it was looking a little dead.

Given that we are still up to our necks in a pandemic, and that all signs are pointing to things getting worse again, my response was incredibly tone deaf.

Upon hearing the word “dead” a song leaped to the front of my brain and lodged itself there. Two hours later it is still insisting that I sing it to myself constantly. At the time, it insisted that I sing it out loud and I did.

A lovely little ditty from the South Park Christmas album called “Dead, Dead, Dead.”

Dead, dead, dead,
Someday we’ll be dead.
Dead, dead, dead,
Someday we’ll all be dead.

Are you effing kidding me Robert? Read the friggin’ room! And by room I mean the entire friggin’ human race!

Asshole.

Tone deaf asshole.

The Stir Crazy Files – Episode 16

We could subtitle this one as the brain scrambled files.  I woke up this morning 100% convinced it was Friday.  I’ve spent the last four weeks thinking every day was Thursday, and now that it actually is Thursday I think it’s Friday.

As Jimmy from South Park would say, “I mean, come on.”