New Clothes

Today I went to two stores to buy new clothes. That in itself is kind of amazing. For years I’ve only been able to buy clothes from Casual Male XL, or whatever the hell they are called now. I call them Tall and Fat in honor of Rodney Dangerfield in the movie Back to School. That was the name of the store his character owned. Anyway, I bought clothes at a Kohl’s today and I can’t remember the last time I was able to find clothes that fit me at a normal department store. It’s kind of amazing.

I bought two pairs of jeans and a pair of khakis. The waist size is four inches smaller than the jeans I bought last month. They are also 12 inches smaller than pre-surgery. I never, ever would have dreamed that could happen. I’m very happy and very shocked. You’d think after shrinking for six months I’d no longer be surprised to see evidence that I am shrinking, but I am.

The waist size was one thing, but the shirts? I bought two collared shirts and three t-shirts. They are two sizes smaller than when I started. I was wearing 4XLT and today I bought 2XLT. What the freakin’ hell? Again, I never even dreamed I would buy a 2X again. Never in a million years.

Now I have to pack up all of the too-big-for-me clothing that I have in my bureau and donate them somewhere. Probably Goodwill again. I have a bunch of old 3X shirts that are still useable. I have a bunch of 4X shirts that are no longer useable. There are a couple of pairs of jeans that are too big but not terribly too big. I kept one pair of jeans from before the surgery because someday it’s going to be really friggin’ funny to put them on to see how much I’ve lost. That day has not arrived yet, but someday.

The Waiting Room

You should listen to the Genesis song called The Waiting Room while you read this post. Actually, maybe you shouldn’t. It’s an atonal noise-fest and it might scare you off. Listen to Firth of Fifth instead. It’s not related at all, it’s just magic.

My weight on the scale here was 291.6. About four pounds higher than last week’s weigh in at home. I blame my shoes and my wallet and my keys and my phone. Yup. They also said my blood pressure was a smidge low. We will have to keep an eye on that, I think.

Week 20 Weigh In

Line up that marching band, babie! Kick off that circus parade! Today is a gigantic day! A huge, massive, gigantic landmark of a freakin’ day!

It’s been 20 weeks since the surgery. I think today is the day that I am going to share just how much I actually weigh, and along with that I am going to share how much I weighed on day one. That number is huge. It’s embarrassing. We’re talking about someone who has been grossly overweight his entire life and never really been shy about the numbers, and this number is too high for me to have shared because it’s so embarrassing. So this post is going to be a big deal for me. I’m not doing it for anyone but me so please don’t comment or anything. Just let me stew in it, okay? Right.

Last week I said I was 4.2 pounds away from flipping down the hundreds column of my total weight. I think I also mentioned that waiting a whole week to step on the scale was going to be impossible and it was. I actually weighed myself on Sunday but didn’t update my records. I was 0.8 pounds away from flipping the hundred. Close but no cigar.

Last week I was 304.2 pounds. Today I am down to 297.4. That’s a drop of 6.8 glorious pounds, and the hundreds column has changed for the second time! I am so fucking insanely happy right now. Pardon the Eff-bomb, but it’s the only adjective that fits the feeling. I never thought I would be here again. Never. My whole adult life I have been over 300 pounds. This is a really big deal. A super big deal.

Now for the embarrassing part that will be topped off by a seriously exciting part. On January 19, 2022 when I walked into the weight loss clinic for the first time I weighed 452 pounds and my BMI was 55. On April 29, 2022 when I walked into the clinic for the last time before having the surgery on May 4th I weighed 431.4 pounds and my BMI was 52.5. Today I am 297.4 and my BMI is 36.2. That’s a drop of 154.6/134 pounds and 18.8/16.3 points. Are you kidding me? ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY FOUR POUNDS!

Prior to the surgery they gave me an estimate of the amount of weight I could reasonably expect to lose. It was between 130 and 170 pounds. I’m over 130 since the surgery so it’s safe to assume the leveling out will start at some point soon. I am nowhere close to being done though. I did the math a few weeks ago and in order to get my BMI down to an actual healthy point I will need to get down to about 190 pounds. That means I still have over 100 pounds to go.

I’m not concerning myself with what still remains right now. Today I am just feeling happy and I want to stay with this mindset for a bit before I start focusing on the future. The day I flipped from the 400s to the 300s (May 16, 2022) was a great day. It felt so good. Today, as we flip from 300s to 200s is just indescribable. I can’t put it into words. It’s epic. It’s magic. It’s majestic.

Just wait until the 200s flip to the 100s (fingers crossed I can get there). Oh boy will that be a crazy day.

Happy 20 weeks, and happy 200s! WOOHOO

Weird Feeling

Maybe it’s because I’ve been thinking about my follow up appointment next week with the surgeon who carved up my innards but I’ve been dealing with a weird feeling much of the day today.

It started before lunch. Maybe 15-20 minutes before.

I’ve been feeling…

Full.

Ever since the surgery I’ve almost never felt full. I dish out a small amount of food and eat it all. When I’m done I’m so tired of all the work that I don’t eat anymore. I don’t stop because I’m full, I stop because I’m finished and just don’t wanna do it anymore.

Today though… I was full. I feel full right now.

How weird is that?

Happy Scale Steppin’ Day

Okay, ladies and gents, it’s Wednesday morning. You know what that means. Who’s ready for a weigh in? Let’s effin’ Go!

You might be able to tell by the tone of my type that it’s going to be good news.

I am down 5.8 pounds, babie! My total weight’s 10’s column changed, my weight lost since surgery’s 10’s column changed, my weight lost since the first check in’s 10’s column changed, and my BMI went down 0.7 points!

Holy Crap!

The total since the start is now 134.8! Dude! One Hundred Thirty-Four and Eight Tenths pounds! I simply cannot believe the number is that high. The total since the surgery (approximately) is 114.2 pounds! Again, Holy Crap! Capital letters and exclamation points galore!

My next check in at the clinic is Monday. Here’s hoping they check me over and tell me that everything is going as well as I feel it’s going. I don’t want any bad news spoiling another 5+ pound week.

I want to have a visual representation of the total weight loss since the start of this mess, but I don’t want to give any actual numbers. This is a screen shot of my weight loss in 2022 from the iOS Health app with the numbers cropped out. Why? I don’t know, because.

It’s not 100% accurate because I wasn’t updating the app for almost two months there, including the entire month of May. I’ve been updating it every time I weigh in since July though. The shape of the curve is accurate even if it’s missing tons of data points. Who cares, look at that downward slope! It’s like a freakin’ black diamond!

I can’t wait to see what next week’s weigh in brings!

Positive Progress

Happy Weigh In Wednesday, boys and girls! I woke up, earned myself a stand hour on the activity app, and stepped on the scale. I lost 5.2 pounds in the last week. Excellent. As my meals have been getting steadily bigger I have been expecting a big drop off in the weight loss pace, but nope. Five pounds is awesome.

There aren’t any milestones this week. Usually there’s at least one area where the 10’s column changes, but not this time. The 10’s column in my weight, my weight lost since the surgery, my weight lost since the first appointment, and my BMI are all the same as last week. If this coming week is good they might all change at next Wednesday’s weigh in. That would be pretty epic.

There is actually one thing to note this week. There are two weigh ins from the long distant past that have been sort of sticking in my head. First, my weight on my wedding day in 2009. Second, my weight at the physical I had in order to go back to UMass Lowell in 2000. I can’t remember the wedding weight. It was either X, or X-25. I’m pretty sure it was X-25, but I am positive that the weight at that physical was X-25 so maybe I am just getting confused.

Here’s the thing, my current weight is X-27. That means all speculation can now end. I am without question at a lower weight than I was at our wedding. That is amazing. I am also at a lower weight than when I started back at UMass Lowell. That is unbelievable. I never thought I’d get to this point again. That physical happened in August of 2000. Almost exactly 22 years ago. How is that even possible? I am lighter today than I was 22 years ago today. It also means that I don’t have any past weigh in sign posts left. The wedding and UMass were the only things that had lodged themselves in my tiny little brain. Now it’s all new-ish territory. That’s crazy.

On a slightly related topic, after I weighed in I did my morning walkies. I mentioned yesterday that for the 30th minute I ran in place instead of walking in place. This morning I stretched that one minute to two minutes. I am wondering… should I just do a separate workout where I just run for five minutes and see how that goes? Walk for 30, run for five. Maybe. I am also doing a little bit of weight lifting and stretching every day. I wonder… am I going to turn into a gym rat lunk? I kinda hope not, but at the same time the idea of actually feeling almost healthy is sort of appealing. I mean, I wouldn’t have done the surgery otherwise, right?

Happy weigh in day. Until next week…

Another Milestone

I am hitting a weight loss milestone as we speak.

I am wearing a t-shirt that I bought at a Rush concert in 2004. It is one size smaller than all of the t-shirts I’ve been wearing for years.

It fits.

It fits well. Not perfectly (it feels a little short), but it fits well.

I think I can officially wear smaller shirts now.

Tick off that box, kids.

Also, it’s a Rush R30 shirt. How awesome is that? I had an R40 shirt but I put it through the dryer by accident and it shrunk. Now it’s Jen’s R40 shirt. After I lose a little more I might go to the official Rush merch store and look for another R40 shirt. Or a Hold Your Fire shirt, because that was the first tour I saw.

I miss Rush.

100

Two days ago I weighed myself and my weight loss since the Gastric Bypass surgery was at 99 pounds on the dot. I was positive that I would not be able to wait a full week to weigh myself again because I would not be able to handle waiting for that number to tip over 100.

I weighed myself today. I have lost 100 pounds since the surgery.

I HAVE LOST 100 POUNDS SINCE THE SURGERY!

Three months and two days and I am down 101.8 pounds. Queue up the marching band and the parade and the circus animals and the fireworks, babie! I’ve lost 100 pounds!

WOOHOOO!!!!!

Thoughts on BMI

Two posts back I wrote a footnote about the possibility of my weight dropping below 200 pounds and how I imagine I would be unhealthily thin at that weight.

According to the site I go to when I want to calculate my BMI, that statement is actually super wrong. The calculator page includes this list of BMI Categories:

Underweight = <18.5
Normal weight = 18.5–24.9
Overweight = 25–29.9
Obesity = BMI of 30 or greater

I have spent my entire adult life in the Obesity range. I have a looooong way to go to drop below that category. With my height being 6’4″ I would have to get down to 246 to have a BMI of 29.9. I am so far away from 246 pounds that I haven’t even considered it a possibility.

In order to get below the Overweight category, I would have to get down to 204 pounds. That seems insane to me. Completely out of the realm of reality. Wow.

That means the range for me to be in the Normal weight category is 152 to 204 pounds. I can’t even imagine it. I feel like, at 152 pounds, if I turned sideways I would be so thin you wouldn’t be able to see me. I would be invisible. Really.

So if dropping from 200 pounds to 199 pounds represents entering Onederland… I guess that wouldn’t be unhealthy for me after all. It’s not a goal though. I don’t have a goal number in mind. My only goal is to be healthier and not have to constantly worry that the heart attack is right around the next corner.

I’ll get there.

Eight Weeks

Hello and welcome to the eight weeks post-op update. TL/DR: I feel friggin great.

I weighed myself this morning. It’s been a real mental struggle to stop myself from weighing in more than once a week. Obviously I am not going to tell you how much I weigh. Nope. I will tell you what the losses are though. Last Wednesday the drop was a lot bigger than I expected. Today was nothing like that, but it was still a little bigger than I expected and I am really pleased.

I was down 5.4 pounds today. It wasn’t enough to change the tens column in my current weight. Changing the tens column is a thrill. Changing the hundreds column… now that’s worthy of a celebration complete with circus animals and a marching band and a Blue Angels flyover. It’s going to be a while before that happens.* Still, I am happy today.

My total loss since a few days before the surgery is now 69.6 pounds. I’d really like to round that up to 70, but no. Let’s be literal with this number. I don’t mind being a little fuzzier with the other total though, but I don’t have to today. The total weight loss since my first check in at the weight loss clinic is now 90.2 pounds. Let me spell that out once more time. NINETY POUNDS!

NINETY POUNDS!

My next check up at the clinic is tomorrow afternoon. I assume they are going to weigh me when I get there. That number will be higher than today’s number (I assume), and I am wondering if I want to include it on my tracker or not. I think it would be a more “official” number than today’s due to the likelihood that the scale is more accurate, and because it’s the same scale I used for both my initial weigh in in January, and the last weigh in before the surgery… But I really don’t want to see that number drop below 90 due to some technicality.

So in summation, allow me to share that I feel fantastic. My energy level… I feel 10 years younger. I can exercise without feeling like I am going to die. I don’t have to stop and rest when I walk for 10 feet. It’s amazing. Yeah, my clothes don’t fit anymore and I look like a clown, but that will be at least partially addressed over the weekend. I still eat too fast and that has kicked my sorry ass a few times now. Nausea is not fun, but I have not been bad enough to take the nausea medication they prescribed for me at the hospital. I just feel great, and I can’t wait to see how I feel with each new week.


*On the Bariatric Surgery Facebook group I have learned that folks refer to the drop from 200 to 199 pounds as Onederland. If I reach Onederland I think I will look like an anorexic. That is too far for me to consider. I think that would make me unhealthy on the other end of the spectrum. Still… Onederland. Sounds pretty engaging.