Mystery Meat

Those tacos I made for dinner looked like regular tacos. They were not. They were special.

The taco meat inside the taco? You thought it was ground beef. No, it was not ground beef.

It was bison.

Oh yeah, you read that right. I just made bison tacos for dinner.

Why yes, I am a bad ass (culinarily speaking).

This One is Going to be Gross

Spoiler alert, this post is going to be T.M.I. and it’s going to be really gross. You have been warned.

***RED ALERT***
***RED ALERT***
***RED ALERT***

Okay, so in the post Gastric Bypass Surgery world there are rules for how you eat. The big one is you eat your protein sources first, then when that’s all gone you eat everything else on your plate. Protein first, non-protein second.

Tonight I made tacos for me and Harry. Even before having my guts hacked to pieces, a taco for me consisted of taco meat and a taco shell and that’s it. Beef with some seasoning (sometimes chicken or turkey, but generally beef) and a taco shell. I used to put the beef into the shell and have a… ya know… taco-ish thing. Now I eat them separately. Beef first, then a shell. Tonight I had 3.2 ounces of beef and half a shell.

The 3.2 ounces of beef went down without issue. The half a shell did too, at first. I was going to have the other half of the shell too but my stomach started feeling a little off so I stopped.

15 minutes later the shit hit the fan. My stomach turned upside down and I had to make the mad dash to the bathroom before it all came up. Fucking taco shell.

My question then… I tracked how much protein was in the beef. How then do account for the small amount of beef that… came along for the ride when the taco shell came back for a second visit?

See? Told you it was going to be gross. I tried to be polite though and never used the word puke once. You’re welcome.

Public Service Announcement

I would like to take a brief moment to make a public service announcement.

Last week’s Taco Kit incident has been rectified. A Taco Kit has been procured and this week Taco Tuesday will take place on Wednesday.

I repeat, Taco Tuesday will take place on Wednesday.

Thank you. We now return you to your regularly scheduled internet surfing.