Tag: Stress

Today is Insane

I’m stressing out, bro.

There are so many people here. A three man electrician team, our regular contractor, his drywall subcontractor, and a landscaper team with at least four people. Talk about a perfect storm. We knew the electricians and our regular contractor would be here. Everyone else is a surprise.

The old cellar lights with the big fluorescent tubes are gone. The last of the drop ceiling framing is gone, the last of the un-insulated cellar walls have been insulated. The front and back yards have been cleaned, including the litter that the wind and the squirrels put into the edge of the woods. Most of it at least. They didn’t do the best job there, but they did a good job everywhere else.

As we speak, the new cellar lighting is being installed and wired up, and the wall board that is going to be installed starting tomorrow is being loaded into the cellar.

From a Covid safety standpoint, everyone is masked and everyone is entering the house through the cellar bulkhead. The cellar is a big open space so everyone can stay as distanced as they need, and no one has to walk through the main floor to get in and out.

Still… It’s stressful. It’s also loud. Lots of banging and hammering and crashing and cacophony and super loud leaf blowers and all of that stuff. It’s making it difficult to work.

Oh yeah, speaking of work. Insert frustrated screaming here. Nothing too terrible, but lots and lots of little things that are piling up and making me want to hide my head under the covers.

So yeah… stressful as hell kinda Tuesday. I’m ready for bed.

Sunday Night Pain

Rob’s writing about pain on a Sunday night. Why? Is he watching Fear the Walking Dead or something? No. That’s not for a couple of weeks. We are still safe.

No, I’m talking about exercise. I still have 24 minutes to do today and I only have 2.5 hours left. My legs are killing me. My back is killing me. Everything is killing me.

Fear isn’t on, but the main show is on. Shits getting weird at the Commonwealth, right? There is 25 minutes left in tonight’s show so I can probably finish my 24 minutes of exercise during the commercial breaks. Har Har Har.

Work was rough on Friday. It spilled over into Saturday. I didn’t hear anything today. Hopefully nothing happened. I’m out tomorrow because I’m taking my mother to a doctor’s appointment. That means I’m worried about work and worried about her at the same time. It could be a fun morning, right?

I don’t feel any negative effects of Covid-19 vax shot #4. Here’s hoping it stays that way.

Okay, the Zombies are back on. No spoilers, but who woulda thought that Daryl was Rick’s father. What a twist!

Super Stressed

Between the weight loss stuff and work and the kitchen remodel and Covid and my mother being in the hospital, I am super stressed. I feel like a rubber band that’s stretched out as far as it can go.

I need to punch in to work at 9:00, go to 3-4 meetings until noon, then go sit with my mother. I am going to be balls to the wall all day until they kick me out of the hospital room. Then I’ll come home and see the latest in the kitchen. That will relax me a bit. The contractor could be finished today. The other contractor will be finished tomorrow. Then it’s time to get into the pre-fab stuff. The contractor/Covid/Stranger-in-my-house-during-a-global-pandemic stress will be gone, but the building and hanging kitchen stuff will replace it.

If I seem a little punch drunk over the next week or two, all that combined is why.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Kitchens

We had a meeting with a kitchen guy at Home Depot tonight. 20 minutes into the meeting we all realized he wasn’t the guy we needed to be talking to.

Jen has been itching for a new kitchen for over a year now. We really can’t afford it, and every time we looking into doing one thing it pulls in five other things and the cost estimate balloons and we back off. We’re going to try again though. This time we’re thinking more of an upgrade or a face lift and less of a remodel. The guy we thought we were talking to tonight is going to come over for a look see tomorrow. Another guy will come on Wednesday for a look see to see about getting rid of the awful paneling and wall paper border in the kitchen and the dining room.

We’re not agreeing to anything yet but hopefully we’ll be able to make it work. I want this to happen because I want my love to be pleased. We’ll see.

The main issue in all of this is that Covid is hardly over. I am not nervous the way I was a year ago, but I am still less than comfortable with it all. I can’t complain though, as I am going to the office regularly and I am going to the weight loss clinic and I am even thinking about getting the band together. I fear I am being selfish by being concerned. I’m not though. I am concerned about everything, I just can’t do much about any of it anymore.

In other news, the album in a day idea might be back on, but it won’t start until morning. I haven’t decided yet. We’ll see. Also, I have an afternoon appointment at the weight loss clinic on Thursday. The weight loss clinic is on the way to Guitar Center in Nashua. I wonder if I might go early and bring my Strat. Also maybe bring my Bassbreaker 18/30. Also, I think we have a Guitar Center credit card. Maybe I’ll bring that too. No promises. I would say I am about on third in favor of going and two thirds against. We’ll see how I feel on Thursday.

Okay, going to watch the Bruins. They are tied with the LA Kings, one a piece after one period.

Conflicting Emotions

My next weight loss appointment is one week from today. I’m conflicted emotionally.

On the one hand I can’t wait to get over the next hurdle and be one step closer to the finish line.

On the other hand, I’m scared shitless. I’m going to be meeting with the doctor who is going to carve up my innards. I mean, it’s terrifying!

So far the drive to move forward is stronger than the fear. I need to keep it that way. For the rest of my life.

One week.

Zoom Number One Complete

My initial consultation is complete and I didn’t spontaneously combust or have a sudden stroke or anything like that. I survived the Zoom call. Sigh of relief, babie.

Three to six months of pre-surgery prep work including 10,000 separate appointments. Then 3-4 weeks out of work afterwards. If we follow that schedule (in other words, if I don’t fuck anything up) then I should be okay for the planned Disney trip in January.

Wait, did I ever mention the planned January Disney trip? It’s mostly hypothetical at this point, thanks to the pandemic, but it has been one of my main concerns about all of this. Yeah there is the physical concerns about having my innards rewired, and there are the concerns about all of the things I will have to change in order to not mess up my rewired stomach (no more caffeine, no more carbonation), but I really didn’t want to mess up the Disney plans after we’ve already had to punt on them a couple of times, thanks Covid.

My medical chart is being put together now. Once that’s set I’ll hear from the clinic to start scheduling the 100,000 next appointments.

I’m not freaking out. I am not freaking out. I am still scared shitless, but I do feel all right over all.

Let’s do this.

It Hits the Fan Tomorrow

I haven’t started freaking out yet, but I expect I will shortly. Or maybe not. I don’t know.

My for really reals first weight loss surgery appointment is tomorrow morning. I took the first half of the day off so that I can freak out, go to the Zoom meeting, and then cry and freak out again. Like, my whole morning is scheduled.

Then again, maybe the fact that I haven’t freaked out yet is a sign that I am for really reals ready to do this. It’s going to suck, and it’s going to suck for months and months, but as far as my health is concerned it’s the right thing to do, right? Right.

I don’t know what to expect. It’s safe to assume I will have a million questions and when the Doc asks me if I have any questions I will completely blank out and not be able to think of anything. Safe bet that prediction is going to come true. We’ll see tomorrow though.

Sigh

Yesterday was Monday and somehow I was feeling optimistic about the state of the universe. Today is Tuesday and… sigh. Something about tomorrow being the start of December is messing me up today. I’m not sure exactly why, but it’s probably Covid-19 and holiday related. We’re not getting a normal Christmas for the second year in a row, which implies that our Covid Christmas is actually now the normal. Shit.

I had three projects to do at work in less than two weeks. I picked off one of them yesterday and was feeling pretty good about the state of things. Now, simply because it’s the next day, I am feeling a little defeatist about the remaining two. Why? Where is my rational brain hiding? Come out and play, brain. Pretty please?

I took the barrels out to the street this morning. The barrels are full to bursting, partly with Thanksgiving detritus, but they’ve spent the whole week in the new little shed thing so the squirrels weren’t able to get at them. 10 minutes after I took the barrels to the street I looked out the window and saw a squirrel sitting on the barrel snacking on some stuff. Sigh.

Okay. Time to punch in to work. Here’s hoping the state of the universe improves a little. Fingers crossed, folks.

Crazier Day

Remember yesterday when I wrote a quick thing about what a crazy day it was?

Today was/is crazier. Hands down, no contest. Today is just crazier.

Tomorrow? Saturday? It’s going to be even crazier still.

Good heavens, what has Robbie gotten himself into this time?

heh heh. May you live in interesting times, babie.

Oh, the Crazy

For the last few months, going to work has often seemed like a break from all the rest of the stuff going on in the world. That is kind of the opposite of normal, right? Being away from work is supposed to be the more enjoyable part of your day.

Welp, we’re officially back to normal! Oh, the crazy stress right now. My head is spinning! WHEEEEEEEEE!

Jen just made an appointment with a plumber to come and look at the source of lake asshole. They are coming for the first look tomorrow. Oh happiness! I am so looking forward to a day when I can go into the cellar without getting my feet wet. That’s going to be a good day.

So much music work to do. So little time. When am I going to finish all this stuff off? When, oh when?