This sucks, man. My team lost and New York’s team won? Talk about a crap fest.
My predictions in the first round were not very good. I picked four series correctly out of eight. The coin flips I used for a control group (or something) picked three out of eight.
How did I do in the second round? Not very good.
Panthers vs Bruins. The coin and I both picked the Bruins. This sucks. I am now 4/9 and the coin is 3/9. Screw you, Panthers.
Rangers vs Whalers. I picked the Rangers, even though it hurts my soul to pick any team from New York, and the coin picked the Whale. The Rangers won. I am now 5/10 and the coin is 3/10.
On to the West…
Stars vs Avalanche. The coin and I both picked the Avalanche and they lost. The Stars moved on and the Avs made me look bad. I am now 5/11 and the coin is a dismal 3/11.
Canucks vs Oilers. The Bruins are out. The Avalanche is out. There’s only one team left that I would actually want to root for. It’s the Oilers. I picked them to win and the coin picked Vancouver. Who won? The Oilers won. Oh thank goodness. I am back up to 50% at 6/12 and the coin is completely shut out in this round and is now at 3/12.
Now let’s move on to the Conference Final round. Round three.
Rangers vs Panthers. Oh good, the team that beat my team for the second year in a row against a team that I absolutely hate. Yippee. I want them both to lose. I am going to pick the Rangers but not because I plan to root for them. In this series I am rooting for the Zambonis. For the coin flip, heads goes to the higher seed and tails goes to the lower. It is tails. The coin picks the friggin’ Panthers.
Stars vs Oilers. At this point I think the Rangers are going to win the cup, but the Oilers are the only team left that I actually like so I am picking them. That’s me going with my heart instead of my head. The coin picks the Oilers too, which guarantees they will lose?
So I am predicting a Rangers vs Oilers matchup in the Stanley Cup Final. You heard it here first.
The first round of the 2024 NHL Playoffs wrapped up last night and the second round kicked off last night as well. Worlds colliding, the universe is spinning out of control! I need to write another predictions post!
Let’s review my picks from the first round, including my coin flip picks. The Bruins won so that’s all that matters, but we’ll review anyway.
In the East…
Panthers vs Lightning. I hate them both. I picked Tampa Bay and Florida won. Pricks. I am 0/1. The coin picked Tampa Bay too so we’re both 0/1.
Bruins vs Maple Leafs. Nothing else matters. The Bruins won and all was right with the world, even though it stressed me out like crazy over the last three games. Damn, Bruins. I clearly picked the Bruins so I am 1/2. The coin toss picked the Bruins as well. We’re both 1/2.
The Rangers vs the Capitals. Damn if I don’t hate both of these teams too. The Rangers won easy. I picked the Caps because I suck at this. The coin picked the Caps too because the coin sucks at this too. We’re both 1/3.
Whalers vs Islanders. Again… hate for both teams. I picked the Whale and the coin picked the Islanders. Finally some tension here! Who won? The Whale. I am 2/4 and the coin is 1/4.
On to the West!
Stars vs Golden Knights. This is the series that ended last night with a game seven. I picked Dallas and the coin picked Vegas. Who won game seven? Dallas. I was right, the coin was wrong. I am 3/5 and the coin is 1/5.
Jets vs Avalanche. I didn’t follow a single second of this series. I picked the Jets and the Avs won. The coin picked the Avs. Oh well. I am 3/6 and the coin is 2/6 and catching up to me.
Canucks vs Predators. I went with the underdog and I was wrong wrong wrong. I picked the Preds and the Canucks won. Fortunately for the predictions competition, the coin picked the Predators too. I am 3/7 and the coin is 2/7.
Oilers vs Kings. I like the Kings. I kinda like the Oilers. I picked the Oilers. So did the coin toss. The Oilers won. That brings me up to 4/8 and the coin is 3/8.
Two important statistical notes. First, I am at 50% which is really the best I can ever hope for. More importantly I beat the coin. Oh yeah, that’s what I am talking about. I’m better than blind random luck, babie! Nice!
Now for the second round, starting in the East…
Panthers vs Bruins. I am still so intensely pissed off over the Bruins choking last year and losing to the Panthers that I may never forgive them. A second round win this year will not erase last year’s shame… but it would be a nice start. Clearly I am picking the Bruins even though the Panthers are probably favored. The coin flip is tails. The higher seed is heads and the lower seed is tails, so the coin picks the Bruins as well.
Rangers vs Whalers. This is a little tough here. Game one already happened and the Rangers won. Does that color my choice? Nope. Even though I hate New York sports teams with the fiery passion of a million burning suns, I was going to pick the Rangers all along. Last night’s game doesn’t change anything. The coin flip is tails, so it picks the Whale.
Now we move over to the West…
Stars vs Avalanche. These two have a history, don’t they? Dallas vs Colorado always sees me siding with Colorado. Thanks to Ray Bourque, I think. I am picking the Avs out of loyalty. The coin also picked Colorado. That’s three tails in a row. Only one more to go.
Canucks vs Oilers. No question this time. Oilers all the way. The coin flip is finally not tails. The coin pics Vancouver.
There you have it, the third round will be Boston vs New York which is freakin’ epic in scope. The west will be Colorado vs Edmonton. You heard it here first, hockey fans!
I asked Google Gemini about the Boston/Florida series. Specifically, I asked the following:
Who do you think will win the playoff series between the Boston Bruins and the Florida Panthers
Gemini’s response?
Predicting the winner of the Bruins-Panthers series is tough! Here’s a breakdown to help you form your own opinion:
Regular Season: The Bruins swept the season series 4-0, with two overtime victories.
Recent Form: Boston needed a hard-fought Game 7 overtime win against Toronto, while Florida swept the Tampa Bay Lightning in five games.
Last Year’s Playoffs: The Panthers pulled off a massive upset, winning Game 7 in overtime after Boston led 3-1. This adds a revenge factor for the Bruins.
While the Bruins dominated the regular season matchup, playoff hockey is a different beast. Experts are leaning slightly towards the Panthers, but both teams have strong arguments.
Game six of the first round series between the Boston Bruins and the Toronto Maple Leafs starts in about half an hour.
I am cautiously optimistic that we aren’t on the verge of a revisit of last year’s first round Bruins choke. My team is going to come out on top tonight. We’re one game away from a spot in the second round.
Come on, my Bruins. Put those Leafs away tonight. You can do it. I feel it in my bones.
The Leafs came back to take game two of the best of seven first round series. If Swayman plays goal in game three and wins, will we have a full blown goalie controversy? We’ll see. Game three is Wednesday (I think… isn’t it?)
Anyway, let’s chase those hockey blues away by listening to a newly mixed crappy song. Quarantine Tunes Volume Seven is done save for figuring out the actual running order for the 11 songs. More on that to come in the future though. For now, here’s the last song.
I watched most of the first period and then just followed the score on my phone until I fell asleep during the third. The Bruins took game one from the Maple Leafs by a score of 5-1.
After two periods of play the Boston Bruins have upped their lead to 4-0 over the Toronto Maple Leafs. Jake DeBrusk has two goals on the night. Excellent.
The Vegas Golden Knights have won the Stanley Cup! Rejoice, as that means the friggin Florida Panthers lost. Does Florida losing make me feel better about the epic, colossal choke the Bruins gave us in the first round? No. No it doesn’t. Not even a little bit. It does feel good though. Spiteful and vindictive and just good.
So it’s time to wrap up my predictions posts for the year. One more series to add to the total. Where did I stand before the final? Where did the accompanying coin flips stand before the final?
Before the final I had picked the winner correctly in seven out of 14 series (7/14). The coin flip picked the winner correctly in five out of 14 series (5/14). In the final, the coin and I both picked Vegas so we were both correct. That means I finished with more wins than losses, babie! Eight out of 15 (8/15)! That gives me a winning percentage of 53.3%. Not terribly good, but not terribly bad either. You might say my predictions were mediocre and I would be okay with that. As long as I’m over 50% I feel okay. As for the coin flip, six out of 15 (6/15) is pretty freakin’ terrible. Statistically speaking a coin flip should average out at about 50%, right? I guess the sample size of 15 is just too small to meet that expectation. The result of 40% is pretty awful, but not too awful. I guess. As long as I did better, that’s all I need from this experiment.
So now we wait until next year. We go through the draft and the free agency period and see what trades happen and rookie camp and training camp and finally back to opening day in October. Here’s hoping the Bruins redeem themselves next season. They have a lot to answer for after that horrible, nightmare of a choke. I’m still pretty pissed off.
You know something? This NHL playoff season has sucked. Suck Suck Sucked. My predictions have sucked, but they always suck. This year the teams and the matchups suck. It’s like the universe has been letting teams advanced based mostly on how little I care about them.
How did my third round predictions work out? Badly. As usual.
Eastern Conference, Whalers vs Panthers: I fucking hate the Florida Panthers. I hate the Whaler-canes too, but I hate Florida even more. As if that nazi prick Desantis weren’t disgusting enough, now the Panthers advance to the Cup Final? Fuck them. I picked the Whale, of course, and I guaranteed they would lose. Pricks. That makes me six out of 13 for the post season, which drops me below 50%. Asshats. The coin flip picked the Whale too so it is now five out of 13. Suck.
Western Conference, Golden Knights vs Stars: I feel almost redeemed here. I picked Vegas. I thought they were going to sweep but they blew two games and made it look like a series before winning in six. They bring me back to 50% at seven out of 14. Thankfully. The coin flip picked Dallas and lost yet again. That’s five out of 14 for a pathetic 35.7%.
So that leaves the final, and I am guessing based on my statement in the Eastern Conference Final recap you can guess who I am going to pick.
Stanley Cup Final Round, Vegas Golden Knights vs the Fucking Florida Panthers: Can you guess who I am picking? Go on, guess. Vegas. Hockey Gods willing, they’ll win it in four, but I can’t be that lucky. The coin flip was heads, so it picks the higher seed, and that is Vegas. We’re both picking the Western Conference champs because Florida sucks. Fuck Florida. Fuck them right in their fucking ears.
If Vegas wins, I will have picked more than half of the matchups correctly. If Vegas loses I will have picked more than half of the matchups incorrectly. Given the results of the first three rounds, I can pretty much bank on Vegas losing because hockey as a living entity hates me almost as much as I hate Florida. Fucking Panther pricks.
After reading that the Florida Panthers advanced to the Stanley Cup Final last night I wanted to take a brief moment to remind everyone that I friggin’ hate them.
I asked Google Bard to write a short blog post about how the Florida Panthers are dicks. It gave me some crap about how they play dirty. It had a bunch of stats but I hate the team too much to verify them all and then post it here. Stupid scruples. I also asked Google Bard to write a short blog post about how no one wants them to win the cup. It gave me something that said how much fun they are to watch and how skilled they are but how no one wants them to win the cup because they are too skilled and too much fun to watch.
Thanks for nothing, Google Bard.
Still, I don’t need AI to tell me why I hate the Florida Panthers. I have that first round choke by the Boston Bruins to remind me… and it will remind me forever and ever. Fucking Bruins. Fucking Panthers. Hopefully Vegas wins the West tonight and they bitch slap Florida with a four game sweep in the final. Pretty please.
Inside the Red Head's Head 