Both cats just freaked out. They chased the mouse behind a chair and cornered it. They both tried to grab it but it zigged and zagged and dodged, dived, dipped, ducked, and dodged and got away.
The chase is on! Good luck getting any sleep tonight with all the mouse hunting racket going on.
Go get ’em, mouse hunting kitties!
Okay, before you get all judgmental I am going to say that we live in the woods, it’s winter, it’s freezing cold out, and we got a metric tonne of snow last night. All of that combined leads to one unfortunate truth: Little tiny furry critters are going to find their way into our house. It is inevitable. It doesn’t mean we’re leaving food out or any shit like that, it just means our house is warm. That’s all. Get over your shit and just enjoy the stupid little story, m’kay?
I was sitting on the couch in the living room working on some music on my laptop. My wife was at her desk in her office working. The two cats were laying together on top of one of the cat trees. They were asleep, as far as I could tell.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw movement in the hallway between the living room and my wife’s office. It was a mouse. It was casually strolling around the corner into the living room. It stayed close to the wall and went behind a chair and I lost sight of it. A few seconds later it popped out again and walked calmly right up to the base of the cat tree! Neither cat noticed. They didn’t move a muscle. Way to sleep on the job, felines!
The mouse changed direction and ran into the next room. I followed it but quickly lost sight of it. I made some noise and shifted some furniture around but the little sucker was nowhere to be found. I went back to the couch and got back to work.
About half an hour later or so I saw it in the hallway again. This time it did not come into the living room with me. Instead it changed direction and ran into Jen’s office. I watched as it went right under her desk, literally inches away from her feet! We can’t have that now can we? I went into the room after it and pulled Jen away from her desk. We had the little home invading bastard cornered against the wall but with the desk in the way neither one of us could really reach it.
Eventually it made a dash for the door and left the two slow moving humans in the dust. Straight out the door, across the hallway, through the living room door and straight into Robin the Cat! It was like something out of a Tom and Jerry cartoon. The mouse skidded to a stop, squeaked, “Holy shit!” clearly at the same instant that Robin yelled, “Holy Shit!” back at it, then it turned around and ran back into the office.
We had it cornered again, this time on the other side of the room. We also had two cats taking a keen interest, but again the little shit managed to make a break for the door and leave us all behind. The four of us gave chase, but it lost us all again and eventually we gave up looking for it. Robin is still stalking around the house determined to catch the furry little asshole. Jen and I are both back to what we were doing before. Lily is doing what she does best… sleeping.
If the cats don’t catch it tonight I am probably going to have to put traps out tomorrow. Sorry, mouse.
My step son, Harry, will be proud of me. I just finished watching Better Call Saul. He really wanted me to watch it. He was raving about it all the time. Now I’ve watched the whole series and he can finally talk to me about it without worrying about spoilers.
FYI, it’s as good as everyone says it is. Go watch it.
Subject change. I mentioned that I bought a few new guitar pedals over the last week. I haven’t had a chance to try them out yet. I’m debating whether I want to integrate them into the board I use at home, or should I make a brand new pedal board instead. I’m leaning toward a new board. Just for a while at least. Just for schnitzengiggles.
Subject change. We have a couch delivery scheduled for this morning. The delivery window they gave me is pretty long. It extends into my work day and it overlaps two scheduled meetings. Here’s hoping we get lucky and the truck gets here early enough to not mess anything up.
Subject change. Our mouse hunting cats had a target last night. We woke up in the middle of the night to see them chasing a gross little teeny tiny rodent around. At the time, the little bastard got away. We don’t see any signs of the prick this morning, but the cats are clearly still on high alert. We live in the woods. One of the biggest rivers in New England runs smack through our town. Mice are a part of life. Still… go get the little home invading asshole, cats. Do your job. Protect your house.
Okay. Time to go start the day. That delivery truck is going to be here… eventually.
We are proud of our two cats. They have protected their house from an invader. A little, tiny, furry, squeaky invader.
They caught a mouse.
We saw them hunting when we got up this morning. There was something in a closet that they really wanted to get at. I saw it for a second. A little brown mouse. It was adorable. It was also a bastard of a home invader who needed to be removed. The mouse got away this morning. It did not get away for long.
Jen walked into a room and found it laying in the middle of the floor, seemingly dead. She turned away to get something to cover the body and when she turned back it was gone. A few minutes later she found it seemingly dead on the floor not far away. Was it actually dead this time or was it just playing dead? I scooped it up and took it outside. Pretty sure it was dead. Poor little sucker.
Good job, cats! Lily and Robin protected their home and their family. They are good mouse hunters. We gave them some treats in thanks. Good job, my little furry friends. We’re proud of you.
I actually feel bad for this little rodent bastard. A little. Not much, but a little.
I got up this morning and walked to the bathroom, ya know like ya do. Both cats were in there just hanging out. That’s odd. Something is up. Lily was just sitting on the floor mat. Robin was investigating something near one of the towel racks. I couldn’t see what she was after. At least not until I looked up. On the shower curtain rod, right in the middle, was a mouse. Just sitting there. Calmly surveying all around him. Oh no you don’t, you home invading fucker!
I had my iPad with me. I used it to swat the mouse off the curtain rod. I hoped the cats would take it from there, but they ran away in abject terror. Chickens. The mouse was a little stunned so I threw the floor mat over it and kicked it against the side of the tub. I would have just stepped on the bastard but I was barefoot and we ain’t going there.
I had the little shit trapped for the moment. Was it dead? Did I kill it when I smooshed the mat against the tub? Hopefully, but doubtful. I had nothing to scoop it up with so I figured I would trap it under the waste basket and figure it out from there. I pulled the mat away and tried to drop the basket down but it was too fast and ran into the corner. We went back and forth behind the toilet a little but I was too slow and it made it out of the room.
It ran into Harry’s room. I had it cornered for a second, but when I reached down to pick up a book off the floor to squash it with it managed to run into Harry’s closet and that was all she wrote.
A few hours went by. Jen and I were both logged into work. Her office is next to the bathroom which is next to Harry’s room. I am in the cellar underneath Harry’s room. I could hear the cats running around above me. Jen could hear the terrified little mouse home invader asshole squeaking. I went upstairs to look and found the cats lounging in the doorway to Harry’s room. Just hanging out. Keeping watch.
A few minutes later Jen asked me to come back. The cats had the little prick cornered in the hallway. This time I was wearing shoes and I was able to kick it against the wall. It wasn’t dead, but it was stunned enough for me to grab a broom and a dustpan and a plastic bag and scoop him up. I put him into the bag, took him outside into the pouring rain, and dropped him into the gopher hole, just like the last one that I caught alive.
I do feel bad about kicking it. Just a tiny bit. Not enough to stop me from doing it again. You invade my home, you furry fuck, you get stepped on. Still. I would have preferred a catch and release kinda thing. This was more like a seriously injure, catch, release, and probably die within 10 minutes as something bigger is going to make a snack out of it. Oh well.
Another good job by the cats. They are skilled mouse hunters, though they don’t appear to be terribly skilled at closing the deal, if you know what I mean. I’ve actually had to put an end to each of their mouse hunts. They haven’t gone beyond the play stage yet. At least not that we know of.
I hate mice.
Remember last week when I wrote all of those posts about the cats hunting mice? Remember how I saw a mouse in the cellar and said the cats weren’t allowed in the cellar, thus implying that it was up to me to take them out with extreme prejudice?
We are a household with two expert mousers. I was hoping to join their ranks and make it three. I put out a bunch of traps but I failed to catch anything. Worse, rather than just ignoring the traps, when I checked them yesterday the bait had been picked clean. The cellar mouse was just messing with me.
That changed this morning. I checked the traps a few minutes ago. I guess the bait wasn’t quite gone on the trap I put between the two desks.
Maniacal laugh.
I guess we are a three mouser house after all.
I checked the mouse traps in the cellar. Nothing.
The cats, however, are on the hunt. They just attacked something on the other side of the room. Good luck, mouse hunters.
Just don’t bring any surprises onto our bed tonight, m’kay? Thanks.
The weekend is about two hours away. 123 minutes, to be exact. I’m finding motivation a little tough to come by this afternoon but I will get everything that needs to be done today done today as far as work goes.
Jen is planning on spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. How good does that sound, right? I will go grocery shopping afterward. I’m a little behind on my protein intake for today so I may need to eat something substantial after I get home. I am ahead of the game on hydration though. My post-lunch one hour pause before having anything to drink will end in about three minutes and I’ve got a 20 ounce bottle of Gatorade Zero upstairs in the fridge with my name on it. After that my daily liquid intake goal will be obliterated nicely.
I put out four mouse traps in the cellar. The cats don’t come down here so it should be okay. Let me rephrase, the cats are not allowed down cellar. They very much want to come down here, I just don’t let them. One trap went off but I think that was due to a ghost, or an Earthquake or something. No mice were involved. I did see one running past the base of the stairs. I was upstairs and opened the door to come down and there it was. Asshole. Was it the same mouse I saw earlier? How the hell should I know, it was a mouse. I wasn’t checking for identifying details. Sheesh.
Reminder to myself: Write lyrics tonight. Record vocals in some random empty parking lot tomorrow morning. Maybe take the cameras to the ocean for sunrise on Sunday. The forecast at Salisbury Beach looks promising. We’ll see. Sunrise would be great, but music is what’s important. I also need to clean the kitchen and do a little work straightening out the kids rooms this weekend. That’s important too, but a different kind of important, you know? Health and well being and happiness vs musical mental health. Simple. Speaking of, when’s the next band practice?
Okay, Robert. Go get that Gatorade Zero and finish your work projects. You’ve got this, red head. No problem. 110 minutes until the weekend.
Post script: There was just a blast of thunder outside that was loud enough to shake the walls a little. It didn’t set off any of the mouse traps though. That’s good.
And just like that, our mouse invader has been vanquished without any bloodshed. The cats might be a little disappointed.
Jen heard some commotion in the bedroom and went to investigate. The cats had knocked over a little waste basket and the mouse ran inside. They had it cornered. The little rodent asshole was frozen in fear, shaking like it was going to tear itself apart. I picked up the basket and took it outside. I flung our little uninvited guest out of the basket and, in a pathetic sense of mischievousness, into what we believe is a groundhog hole on the edge of the back yard. Ain’t I a stinker?
The cats are confused. They still smell Mr Mouse so they are still trying to hunt it. Jen tried to reward them for their hard work by putting out a handful of treats for them. They haven’t even noticed yet, but they will once things calm down.
Good kitties. You have protected your house. I’m proud of you.
It’s time for our two new cats to prove their worth to the household. Yesterday we started seeing clear signs that they were stalking something. The hunt was on. Last night Harry got a brief glimpse: a mouse. Later, Jen and I also saw it hiding in a tiny space between a cabinet and a wall. I tried getting it with a broom but failed miserably.
The cats were hyper vigilant throughout the night but haven’t had any success yet. There was a moment this morning where I heard them attacking from the next room, and also heard their prey squeaking in terror. I felt kinda bad, but that’s the price you pay for invading our home.
The cats have two responsibilities in this house. One is to be adorable and let us pet them and snuggle them. The other is to eliminate small furry invaders. It’s time to hold up your end of the bargain, Robin and Lily. I have full confidence in your mousing abilities. Make Daddy proud, girls.
No problems last night as far as stomach pain goes. I was a little nervous before bed. I was a little queasy. Not bad, but just aware that I wasn’t at 100%. I was also so thoroughly exhausted that I couldn’t really think straight. I turned in at about 11:00 but I forgot to clean out my CPAP mask so I went to sleep without it. I woke up at about 3:30. My first thought was, here we go again. Then I realized what woke me up. It wasn’t in my stomach, it was on my stomach. Miss Lily had jumped on me and was very insistent about showing me some affection. I gave her what she wanted. She doesn’t really show me any attention like that, so I wasn’t about to say no.
Once she had her fill I tried going back to sleep, but I was pretty much awake. I just sort of laid there for a while, then I got up and got a new CPAP mask out of my closet. I had to deal with Miss Robin who ran inside while I had the door open and wouldn’t come out. I swapped out the drool’d in mask for the new, clean one and went back to bed. I got to listen to an attack on the mouse before I fell asleep. My alarm was set for 7:00am but I snoozed it until a little before 8:00. So the good news is, no stomach issues or anything health related. The bad news is I didn’t sleep through the night the way I was hoping. The lesser good news is that I did snag about seven hours of sleep that I very much needed, though I am still feeling really tired this morning.
Here’s hoping tonight continues to show improvement.
I was afraid of this. I have fully committed myself to binge watching all of Star Wars The Clone Wars. There are 133 episodes. It’s going to take a while. I know I tried doing this once before but fell off the wagon very early. Why? What stopped me?
During this morning’s faux jog (pronounced, yog) I found out. Season one, episode eight… the entire episode focuses on Jar Jar and it is just as insufferably awful as you would expect. I made it through without vomiting but it did sap my re-watching enthusiasm by about 65%. Oh well. Maybe I’ll go back to the X-Files for a couple of days.
If I don’t get a haircut today I am going to go insane. Just warning you. Ya know, in case I start posting things that are more insane than normal. If I do, you’ll know why.
Inside the Red Head's Head 