Snack Irony

Bloganuary writing prompt
What snack would you eat right now?

A day late and a dollar short. Sounds like me.

I had every intention of answering Friday’s writing prompt question on Friday, but I woke up sick and my whole day went down the toilet (literally and figuratively) and I never got around to it. That means that you get Friday and Saturday’s writing prompts on Saturday. I can see how amazed you are.

I will keep this one short and painful and hyper focused on the goings on in my stomach yesterday. The answer to the question at it’s basic level was I couldn’t eat a snack if I tried.

I woke up a little late and my stomach was a little sore. As I started to go about my morning routine that soreness became major pain. I tried to have some water, as I always do at the start of my morning, and had to stop after a small amount. I got my first round of vitamins in at least. I was curious if the pain was due to hunger, which sometimes happens, even though I knew it wasn’t. I tried to eat a protein bar but had to stop after a few bites. 

That was it. I had another little bit of water later in the day but that went badly too. All in all I finished the day with about eight ounces of water (the goal is 64) and maybe five grams of protein (the goal is 80). I couldn’t have had any more if I tried. The very thought of food made me feel nauseous. 

So the literal answer to the question of what snack I could have eaten at any given moment yesterday was none. Today might be a different answer, but I am going to take it as easy as I can. I probably will stick to protein bars until dinner just to make certain that everything is okay now.

I’m sure I will let you all know how it goes as the day rolls on. stay tuned?

Better

Well yesterday sure sucked, didn’t it?

Bad stomach pain, nausea, was it dumping syndrome? Maybe. I’ve felt like that twice before but the other times cleared up after 4-5 hours where yesterday took the whole day. At one point I said to my beloved bride that I had a feeling a good puke would do me well. A few hours later, around 8:00pm, I think, I did throw up a little and eventually I started to feel better. By the time we went to bed I was coming out of it.

It’s almost 8:00am now and I’ve already had more food and water than the entire day yesterday. I’m hoping to take it slow for now. I’m waiting out the hour after eating before having a drink. It’s a little tough as I’m still seriously dehydrated from yesterday. I’ll have it straightened out soon enough though.

My wife was under the weather yesterday too. We both rolled a snake eyes on our Fridays. She seems better now too. Here’s hoping we both keep improving. Wish us luck.

Sick

My gastric bypassed stomach is in full revolt today. There is so much pain.

It’s not the worst pain I’ve experienced but it has hung around the longest, by far.

I’m afraid to eat anything but I have to try. How about a little lemonade to start with?

Here we go…. Wish me luck…

Business Idea

Daily writing prompt
Come up with a crazy business idea.

No.


For 30 years I’ve been trying to come up with a business idea. First with my friend Larry, then with my wife Jen. I’ve never come up with a single thing that would be worth investigating, seriously or jokingly or “crazy” or anything.

If I had, do you really think I would post it publicly on the internet? Even if it was a silly joke? How fucking stupid do you think I am?


ADDENDUM: I half expect tomorrow’s prompt to be something like post your social security number and your bank account details. 

Attachments

Daily writing prompt
Describe an item you were incredibly attached to as a youth. What became of it?

I will give you three items from different points in my youth.

Item number one: The stuffed animals.

When I was a toddler I had two stuffed animals. One was a teddy bear and the other was a bunny. I think the bear’s name was Teddy (very original, Robert) and the bunny’s name was Bunny (even more original, Robert). I think I was four years old but it might have been five. I’m not sure exactly. Without any prompting from any adults or older children, I decided that I was too old for my stuffed animals. I took them into the kitchen and explained to them that I could no longer keep them around and dropped them into the trash barrel. My mother watched me do it.

A year or so later I found them in a cabinet under the kitchen sink. My mother was apparently heartbroken watching me try to force myself to grow up (or whatever the hell I was doing) and pulled them out of the trash and hid them. She was worried that after a few days I would miss them and be a mess. If that happened she could pull them out of hiding and save the day. That never happened though. Once I found them I did keep them, but by then I was totally over them. I don’t know how long I kept them, but eventually they went away. I think the bear fell apart and the bunny was just worn out.

Item number two: Huffy Thunder Road.

I do not recall how old I was when these events took place, but it was definitely pre-teen. It was my first real bike. A Huffy Thunder Road. That model of bike came with a number plate. Most of them were number four. A lot were number 54. Mine was number 45, and I think it was the only 45 I had ever seen. I may have the 54 and 45 reversed, but I am pretty sure mine was 45. 

I rode that bike everywhere. One night I left it in my next door neighbor’s yard. After I had gone in for the night one of the neighbors kindly walked it back to our yard. After that, at some point in the dead of night, it was stolen. I was crushed. It was my fault for not putting it away properly, and that made it worse. My sister had recently graduated to a 10-speed bike so I rode her Huffy Star Spangler until I could get a new bike. My new bike was a 10-speed and it was the first actual mountain bike I had ever seen. It was MASSIVE. I never forgot about that Thunder Road though. I loved that bike so much.

Item number three: Gibson Les Paul Deluxe.

My first guitar was an acoustic guitar that had belonged to my Uncle. He gave it to me for my birthday in 1986. My first electric guitar was a cheap starter model (A Hondo stratocaster copy with one humbucker pick up) that I got for Christmas, I think also in 1986. My first high end guitar was a Gibson Les Paul Deluxe that I bought from Russo’s Music in Lowell, MA in 1987. I was 16 years old. That still counts as “youth,” right? 

In December 1991 my friend Jeff the drummer and I were trying to start a new band. We auditioned a singing bass player one day. He was WAY too old to be in a band with us and he wasn’t very good, but he had a ton of fun, easy, catchy original songs and we had fun jamming with him one day. There wasn’t much chance of forming a band, but it was a fun day. Afterwards I drove home and was feeling pretty beat. I took my saxophone and my gig bag into the house with me (I was in music school at the time and was a saxophone major) but left my guitar and my amplifier locked in the back seat of my car. I planned on bringing them into the house, but I never got around to it.

The next morning I went outside and found one of the back windows was smashed in and my guitar and amplifier were gone. A thief or thieves had broken into a bunch of cars on our street that night, including my sister’s which was parked next to mine. They hit the jackpot with my car. I still have not recovered. I freakin’ loved that guitar.

There you have it. Three things I was attached to and what happened to them. Part of me is still wanting to get another Les Paul Deluxe. I think I want a Junior and a Firebird and a Standard with P90 pickups first, but a Deluxe is definitely on the I-Want list.