At 7:10pm I took a bite of chicken and either didn’t chew it enough or ate it too quickly and my stomach became very unhappy. It felt like it was stuck outside, waiting for the digestive doorman to let it into my stomach pouch thingie.

It’s 9:40, 2.5 hours later, and it still hasn’t cleared. The fuck, chicken?

At least I didn’t set the NHL record for wins in a season and then blow a three games to one lead and get bounced from the first round of the playoffs though, right? I’ve got that going for me.

Fuckin’ Bruins.