There may be time for me to play my guitar tonight. Not only that, I may have an opportunity to play through an amp at ear bleeding volume. Nice, huh?
How much do you want to bet that I’ll sit on the new couch watching television instead? I have zero motivation for anything right now. No motivation at all.
This cat 100% looks like I feel. She is absolutely my spirit animal right now.
Motivation… I just can’t…
What is wrong with me?
I keep coming up with ideas for creative things to do and I keep failing to do them. I can’t even get myself to start them, never mind finish them. What the hell, Robert?
Did I get up early and go to the ocean to take pictures? No, of course not. Don’t be fucking ridiculous. I slept three hours past the alarm. Of course I did.
DoI play the guitar every day? Do I play the guitar once a week? Don’t be stupid.
Did I plant peanuts? Did I make sugar free ice cream? Am I going to do either? Don’t be stupid, of course not.
Literally the only thing I can bring myself to do as far as projects are concerned is watch the fucking television. I’d say I was going to melt my brain but clearly it’s already been completely liquified.
Motivation is tough to come by right now. I woke up at 5:40am, did my 30 minutes of exercise, ate some breakfast, watched an episode of Pennyworth and a bunch of film photography youtube videos, and that’s it. It’s almost 8:00am now and motivation is sort of escaping me.
The whole getting up early to get my exercise in before anyone wakes up thing is kicking my ass. Both in the exercising sense and in the not sleeping enough sense. I kinda feel zombiesque this morning. The background music on this particular grainydays episode isn’t helping.
It’s not like I have a lot on the agenda at the moment. The kids aren’t coming until late morning so all I really have to do is take a shower and clean off the exercise sweat. I could maybe put up some more outdoor christmas lights too, but other than that and prepping some lasagna for dinner there isn’t much on the docket this morning. Really all I need to do is stand up, walk upstairs, and take a friggin’ shower. I just don’t wanna.
Oh, and yesterday I said I needed to do car music this morning or NaSoAlMo was going to die a slow, painful death. Re-read the above three paragraphs and take note of how I did not mention car music at all. Rest in Peace 2022 NaSoAlMo… we hardly new ye.
Okay… wake up, asshole. Go get some shit done.
Inside the Red Head's Head 