Two Stops Today

I had a doctors appointment today. Did you know that my primary care doctor moved to a new location? I didn’t. I was a couple of minutes late. Ooops.


Everything went swimmingly. I was told to keep up the good work, so I will.


I got out of the appointment early enough to make two stops for Jen. One at a drug store, the other at a grocery store. When I got home it was still early enough for me to pack up all of my clothes that are now too big for me and bring them over to goodwill and donate them. Hopefully someone will find a good use for the old suit I included, as well as last year’s ugly Christmas sweater. I guess I have to get a new one of those soon too.



I have a doctors appointment this morning that is not related to my weight loss surgery. Is that even possible?

My primary care office called me a couple of months ago (I think) and reminded me that I haven’t had a standard check up in 600 years. Maybe it’s time, they suggested. Okay.

My exercise is done for the day, breakfast is done (protein bars again. I’m a little gun shy after a few bad meals this weekend), I’m all ready to go. Why do I feel nervous? Because I always feel nervous about doctors appointments. Oh well.

The Walking Dead is over. The episode was good. I wonder if a year from now will I still think it was good. It wrapped up the one outstanding storyline and then gave about half an hour of postscript that felt a little confusing. They did kill a bunch of zeds though, so that was cool.

Okay. Time to go. Wish me luck.

Planning for Tomorrow

I am only working half a day tomorrow. I am leaving early for a doctors appointment. I am meeting with the nutritionist. I have a note on my phone with a few questions I need to ask. Hopefully it will all go well.

Star Wars: Andor comes out tomorrow. I am so ready. They are giving us three episodes on day one, and the scuttlebutt says they should have just released it as stand alone movie. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I had zero interest in this show when it was first announced, but the closer we get to the release the more hyped up I got. Now that it’s here I cannot wait. I hope to get up early enough to watch at least one episode before work. Let’s go!

This doesn’t relate to tomorrow, as far as I know, but the great spider hunt just tallied four more victims. One of these days those bastards are going to organize themselves into some form of spider militia and they are going to come for me. Until that day comes… the hunt continues.

Forgetful Doofus

My next doctor’s appointment is Monday afternoon. This morning I realized that I had completely forgotten that I need to have blood work done before the appointment. Idiot. I logged in to my patient portal and found the orders waiting for me to bring them somewhere. Idiot.

I called the clinic to find out where I can go to get the labs done. They said go to the hospital’s main campus. Okay, I can do that. I was thinking to myself that if they open at 8:00am I can probably get in and out quick enough to not be late for work. I gave the hospital a call to find out what time they open, hoping for something earlier than 8:00. They open at 5:30am. Yeah, I think I can squeeze that in before work.

Still… idiot.

Doctor’s Appointment Day

When I met with the psychologist he told me that I would know I’m coming to the end of things when they book a second meeting with the surgeon. This afternoon I have my second meeting with the surgeon. I thought I would book a surgery date after this, but I already have a date so there’s no mystery left.

Well… I don’t exactly know what we’re going to discuss today. I can speculate, but why bother. I know I am still not at my pre-surgery goal weight, but I still have a couple of weeks to go.

The main difference between today and all of the other appointments is that I am not even a little bit nervous. Likely that will change as the time gets closer. We’ll have to see.

I’ll let you all (and by you all I mostly mean my future self as I look through all of this stuff years from now) know how it goes.

Last Appointments Booked

Here’s another irrational fear post.

There are three doctors appointments I need to have before my surgery date. One is to meet with my surgeon. Another is to meet with the anesthesiologist. As you may have guessed, I totally misspelled “anesthesiologist” on my first attempt. The third is a class that goes over what I will need to do post-surgery.

The surgeon appointment was already booked. We scheduled that on the same phone call that scheduled the surgery. The other two appointments were still up in the air.

Until now…

They just called to book them. It’s all set. Sure it’s a teeny tiny, seemingly insignificant step in the process, but when it comes to gutting my innards, every step is huge… even when it isn’t.

Getting closer. We are definitely getting closer.

Less Than One to Go

On February 3rd, two months and one day ago, I was told to lose 5% of my weight in preparation for the weight loss surgery. I weighed myself this morning. I have 0.4 pounds to go. I would do the math to figure out what percentage I am at with 0.4 pounds to go but then you could use that to figure out exactly how much I weighed on that first day and I don’t want to let you do that.

I just drank my morning protein shake and had my morning vitamins and supplemented it all with a fist full of Tylenol because holy shit my back is killing me. I don’t know that my back has ever hurt as much as it does at this moment. Oh my shit, my back hurts.

Today’s plan involves going to my parents and picking up my mother and taking her to a doctors appointment. We’re going to get the results of her last blood test and see how her cancer numbers look. They’ve been pretty much perfect for the last year-plus and I am very optimistic that those results will continue.

After that I will come home and find some demo happening in the cellar. First on the list is the grid that until recently held the drop ceiling. After that it’s the rest of the ugly paneling on the walls. Most of the paneling came down during the flood clean up last year. You might recall me bitching about the paneling in the dining room recently. Suffice to say that the paneling in the cellar is 100 times uglier. Tomorrow the electrician is coming to replace the existing fluorescent lights that don’t really work anymore. There used to be six banks of lights with two tubes each. Only two of them still work, (it’s not the bulbs, I replaced the bulbs and the lights stayed dead) and one of those two only works some times. It’s been good the last week because it knows its end is coming and it wants to stay alive, but more often than not it doesn’t work when I flip the switch. Replace ’em all!

On top of that there is something going on at work that I am not going to be around for and I am feeling pretty shitty about that. I feel like I am dropping the ball. I don’t think anyone else feels that I’m dropping the ball, but I do so that’s that. Hopefully it will be quiet today. Fingers crossed.

Did I mention my back was hurting?

0.4 pounds to go. Oh yeah, and the surgery happens one month from today. Yikes!

Shit is About to Get Real

I just had my Zoom call with the dietician. Woah boy, here it comes.

Insurance requires me to have sign off from a psychologist, a cardiologist, and a dietician. I already had psych and cardiology. The psychologist* told me that I would know things are close when they scheduled a second meeting with the surgeon.

The call I had today said the next step is a second meeting with the surgeon.

I have the dietician’s sign off.

Holy shit. This thing could actually be happening. Still zero clue on a timeline, but the thing I was told would be the sign that surgery is imminent is the next thing I have to do.

In the immortal words of the guy from Quantum Leap:

Woah boy.

*Should I be capitalizing the names of the departments? Should I be capitalizing psychologist when I am referring to a specific psychologist without using his/her/their name? Grammar is a bitch, you know?

Here Comes the Irrational Fear Again

It’s time again. Time to feel afraid of a doctors appointment that I am choosing to go to rather than being asked to go to. Time to feel afraid of myself more than anything else. I have another weight loss surgery appointment. The second meeting with a dietician. Not the same dietician, she had to call out of the office today, but my second dietician appointment over all.

I am choosing to do this even though I am scared shitless. I’m much less afraid of things now than I was two months ago, but I’m still scared. I am also still more afraid of not doing it than doing it, hence I’m still doing it. Get it?

Today was supposed to be a mid-morning Zoom call, now it’s an early morning phone call. It doesn’t matter. Either way, I want to do this… I need to do this… I cannot not do this… yet I am still afraid. I guess the difference now compared to two months ago is that then I was afraid of the surgery. Now I am strangely afraid of the surgery and equally afraid of being told I don’t qualify for the surgery. How screwed up is that, emotionally speaking?

Wish me luck.

Oh yeah, and the title of this post is totally going to be the title of my next album.