Phone Calls

The downside of four day weekends is the hectic, stressful first day back. Today was no what you would call fun.

More annoying than the usual work stuff was the almost constant flood of telemarketer calls. I don’t know if I set a personal world record tonight or not, but it’s got to be close.

It’s a rainy, gloomy, awful day outside, but we’ve made some progress on Christmasy stuff… so even with the robots ringing my phone off the hook, it’s still pretty cool.

HoHoHo.

Out of Control

It’s still November, but Christmas is literally exploding around here. We are completely out of control, and the kids haven’t even been involved yet.

Even Patches is overwhelmed.

Thanksgivmas

I think I might need to admit defeat on this one.

Thanksgiving is pretty much my favorite holiday. I probably post that every year but it’s true. I just love me some Thanksgiving.

This year, Covid-19 is screwing everything up. No large groups. No family gatherings. Effectively no Thanksgiving. The kids are at their dad’s on the day itself, and also for that whole weekend. That means Jen and I will be alone. We’ll do something low key, and then have a full blown Thanksgiving on the first weekend they are with us. It will be a great Thanksgiving, even if it’s not on Thanksgiving.

What else does this mean though? What other effects does the lack of a normal Thanksgiving have? In a word: Christmas.

It’s November 18th and it’s safe to say that Christmas is already here. The Christmas lights are on the house, there’s a new fake tree that’s ready to be put up, there is a huge box full of new decorations just waiting for the go ahead.

One more thing? Jen bought a Christmas theme quilt for our bedroom. It was delivered yesterday. It’s in the washing machine right now. Before we sleep tonight, it will be on the bed.

It’s November 18th and the Christmas decorations are already going up. We’re going to have Christmas for Thanksgiving this year and no amount of complaining by your humble narrator here is going to stop it. Ho Ho Gobble Gobble Ho.

Neglecting the Ol’ Bloggie

I haven’t been posting much lately. There just aren’t enough hours in the day, you know what I mean? Work is Insane with a capital I, the holidays have been super stressful. So much to do, so many demands, so many headaches. I haven’t been sick, but through the last 2–3 months or so I have generally felt like sickness is right on the doorstep. I just want summer back, you know what I mean?

I booked a vacation day for this coming Friday so that I could have the full day to get ready for the next gig. I scheduled the day off back in October, right around the time we played the last gig. Since then we have booked a major vacation for late summer. No spoilers, but I need to use up a sizable chunk of my vacation time. So much so, that I had to book more time than I currently have in the bank. That means for the next few months I can’t take any more vacation days. Yikes! That’s especially painful because I feel like I need a good couple of days off. Granted, the holidays are helping but I feel like I need a couple of days off when the rest of the world is working. Now don’t get me wrong, this coming weekend is going to be spent with the love of my life and that is far and away my favorite way to spend time. I just need to be able to hide under the covers for a day or two. That ain’t happening.

Sure I have been bitching about the holidays, but Christmas was fun. The kids were great, the family was great, everything was great. I was very happy. I just wish that with all the time and energy spent preparing for Christmas, that Christmas itself could last a little longer. A week, maybe? That seems fair. We don’t have plans for New Years Eve, but we do for New Years Day, there is a much needed game night, and we do have plans for New Years Eve Eve, there is a gig to play. We had our final pre-show rehearsal on Monday. I asked the band if we could agree to never, ever book another December show. They were all very quick to agree. It has kinda gotten in the way this month. It will be another really fun experience when it happens on Friday, but I will be pretty pleased that it’s over with.

My 21 year old cousin Abigail got married today. It was a surprise. No one outside of her immediate family knew it was happening until it was already done. Her husband is a soldier and is being sent overseas. They decided to tie the knot ahead of his deployment. Very romantic, yes? I wish the two of them the best. Speaking from experience, being married is the best thing ever. I wouldn’t want to change a thing. I hope someday in the long distant future they look back on their lives together and say the same thing. Congratulation Abbie and Tim.

I am sure I could come up with a few more post-worthy topics, but I must run off to pick up the kids. Talk to you later, okay?

The Prep Continues

The cleaning isn’t done, but it’s almost done. The cooking is about to start, but the baking is done. The wrapping is done. The Barenaked Ladies Christmas record is spinning.

It’s almost Christmas.

Christmas spirit is still virtually nil. Maybe a 2 on a scale from 1–10. It’ll pickup once the cleaning is done and I can finally take a much needed shower (ew!) and start calming down.

HoHoHo, everyone.

Stupid Deer, Stupid Stupid Deer

As I was putting my shoes on this morning I gazed out the window without really paying attention to what I was looking at.

Movement caught my eye.

A deer!

Of all the wild kingdom critters we get out back, deer are still my favorite. As he (it was probably a she, but I still write he because it has one fewer letter… I’m just efficient that way) moved behind a tree and temporarily out of sight, I looked around for more deer. There weren’t any that I can see, which probably means there were 100 of them because those suckers know how to camouflage themselves like you wouldn’t believe.

So left with one deer in sight I did what any normal American would do on the day before Christmas Eve, I looked closely to see if this deer had a glowing red nose.

Now I know he’s not a reindeer. I’m not an idiot, you know, but given that all of the reindeer in the Rankin and Bass Christmas specials look just like your garden variety white tailed deer that you can see in just about any state in the Union, I thought that maybe it was a reindeer just trying to blend in with the locals. As I stated before, they can camouflage the shit out of themselves.

Nope. No glowing red nose. He even looked directly at the house at one point. If his nose was red, there is no way I would have missed it. Still, I started singing a little tune on the assumption that our back yard woods deer was one of Santa’s reindeer in disguise.

You know Dasher and… none of the others, cause he’s the only one out there….

The song kinda ran out of gas at that point. I decided to leave off the introduction part and just start with the melody that most people know.

That deer that’s in the woods there
Nosing around the leaves.
He is the only one out there.
are the others on sick leave?

All of the other deer there
Decided not to show their face.
They just left this one deer
to wander all around the place.

Then one foggy Christmas Eve Eve
Santa came to say.
I am kinda screwed you know
Where did all those other deer go.

But all the other deer loved him
Even though they decided to flee.
Those human things are crazy
Let them eat him not me.

That was fun, wasn’t it? As our one deer visiter friend left the area behind our house so that we couldn’t see him anymore, I realized something troubling…

I have that damn Christmas song stuck in my head.

Oh no! The horror! The horror! The horror!

Christmas Pickle

What to do??

I want to get my wife one more gift for Christmas but I haven’t a clue what to get her. It’s a quandary, a conundrum, a pickle, a riddle wrapped in an enigma, stop me before I push this run on sentence any further.

What to get her? She’s already got a computer so that’s out. I am starting to stress out! Maybe a stress relief toy thingie. No, I get her that every year!

If only I could fit a new Tesla into her stocking. None of that self driving car crap for us though. As the Muppets once said, getting there is half the fun. (They said that, didn’t they? In “Moving Right Along” from the first Muppet movie?)

Google Chrome’s spell check is okay with Muppet, but it’s not okay with Muppets. I guess there can be only one after all. Is Kermit the Frog Scottish? He doesn’t sound Scottish, but then again the guy who played the Highlander was French so who knows what to believe, am I right?

I am so confused.