8:51pm on Day 19

Things to do if I test negative tomorrow…

  • Get the Mazda inspected. It’s only three months late.
  • Grocery shopping. Instacart has been fun and all but it will be nice to not have half of our groceries be the wrong things.
  • I want to say go out shooting photos, but it’s supposed to rain all weekend. If we get a little surprise sunshine then maybe.
  • Return a couple of items to Best Buy and Amazon.
  • Change the mask, hose, filter, and tank on my CPAP machine. I will do this even if I don’t test negative, but I figured I’d add it to the list so I don’t forget… again.
  • Pick up a copy of EA Sports NHL24 which was released today.
  • Watch the first episode of season two of Loki with Jen. Again, not Covid related but will happen anyway. I wonder if Harry would be up for a group watch?

Here’s hoping tomorrow sees the end of this ridiculous virus that’s kept me locked up for almost three weeks.

Photo a Day Post

Today’s Photo a Day photo is a candle because I am getting tired of using guitars and cats every day and I can’t leave the house and use something else. Sigh with Covid-19 frustration.

36/365
36/365
DSC_2010
Alternate

Maybe I’ll test again tomorrow and then I’ll be able to leave the house and see the world again.

9:11am on Day 19

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…

Well……. shit.

I tested myself for Covid-19 again this morning. Same results as two days ago. You have to squint to see it, but there is the faintest little line. It’s just barely there. It was so faint that I took the test upstairs to my wife and asked her opinion. She called it positive too.

Shit.

I really needed this test to be negative. I didn’t just want it, I needed it. I am so sick of this crap.

This stupid Covid Live Blog continues for at least one more day. Or for forever. Whichever comes first.

Imposter Syndrome

Daily writing prompt
Tell us about a time when you felt out of place.
View all responses

When have I felt out of place? How does every minute of every day for about 50 years sound to you?

You’ve heard of “imposter syndrome” haven’t you? Let’s ask Google Bard for a short definition:

Imposter syndrome is a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their skills, talents, or accomplishments and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a “fraud”. Despite external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds, and do not deserve all they have achieved. Individuals with imposter syndrome incorrectly attribute their success to luck, timing, or deceiving others into thinking they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves to be.

https://bard.google.com/chat/334426d4192b1f8c

There, now that you know the definition of imposter syndrome, welcome to my world. I feel this way about literally everything. Work, play, hobbies, family, friends, literally everything. Know that I am using the word “literally” correctly here, not ironically.

I always feel out of place. I always feel like a fraud. I have no idea why anyone keeps me around for anything. Why am I the only one who sees it? Why am I the only one who sees what a joke I am? I will never, ever understand.

8:16pm on Day 18

I have a sneaking suspicion that my last post with the tag “Live Blogging Covid” will be written and shared tomorrow morning. At least if all goes well that should be the case.

I am planning on taking a Covid test tomorrow before work. Yesterday’s test was just barely positive. I am optimistic that tomorrow’s will be negative. I say this even though I am still a bit sniffly and I had a teeny bit of a nasty coughing fit this afternoon while on a weekly one on one meeting with one of my staff members.

So… yeah. Let’s keep looking at that bright side and keep those fingers and toes and eyes firmly crossed for good luck. I wants me some good news tomorrow. Here here.