Conflicted

I am conflicted and I always get into this state when the kids are involved.

When my step daughter moved away to college in 2019 I was conflicted. On the one hand, I wanted her to go away to school and have a fantastic experience and learn a ton and make new friends and start her life and have everything be amazing. On the other hand I wanted her to stay home with us forever.

Two years later when my step son went away to college it was the same thing. I wanted him to go to school and have the time of his life and learn incredible things and have adventures and excitement and make memories that would last a lifetime while also not wanting him to leave us, ever.

In May of 2025 my step daughter moved home. She graduated and worked a two year contract at the University. When the contract ended she came home to live with us while she figured out her next move. The next move was grad school, but she had to work out the details. It took a little more than a year, but next month she is going to start school in California. 

I am so excited for her I could burst… again… just like 2019. Just like my step son in 2021. I fear I might spontaneously combust out of excitement for her future. She’s going to finish grad school with a PHD and then every time I see her I will ask her, “what’s up, doc?” and it will be epic and no one will ever get tired of that stupid Bugs Bunny joke and we will always laugh and it will be perfect.

Also, I don’t want her to move. I mean, I thought moving from Massachusetts to Vermont was bad… California? No way!

She’ll still be here for a few more weeks, but the next milestone in the moving process happened today…

It’s time to start packing. I’m excited and sad at the same time, but what else is new?