Hockey Panic

I’ve written about this before, probably a few times, but I’m doing it again so there…

Is it like this in other regions of the world? I live near Boston, Massachusetts in the good ol’ U.S.of A. Folks in Boston take their professional sports teams seriously. Very seriously. Ridiculously seriously. We’re kinda nuts. It’s the same across all of the major sports. Red Sox fans are nuts about their baseball team. Patriots fans are nuts about their football team. Celtics fans are nuts about their basketball team. Bruins fans are nuts about their hockey team. Revolution fans… are there any Revolution fans? Is pro soccer even a thing?

When I say we’re nuts about our teams, I don’t mean that in a positive way. I mean that in a clinical, potentially dangerous, bordering on mental illness kind of way. We’re insane. Our entire well being is often tied directly to our favorite team. For example, a few days ago the Boston Bruins beat the Toronto Maple Leafs in game four of their first round, best of seven playoff series. For those of us who are out of control with the craziness kinds of Bruins fans, that win put us on top of the world. Nothing could ever go wrong. Life is good. Life is grand. Go Bruins, the sun shines upon us favorably, world without end, amen. Last night, however, the Bruins lost to the Maple Leafs in game five of the series. That resulted in a spiraling depression that can never be undone. Life is unbearable. Life is intolerable. Nothing will ever go right for us again. the world is ending and we should just put it out of its misery and get it overwith.

My question, again, is… are sports fans in other cities this freakin’ insane? Are fans in other parts of the world inclined to tie their mental health and sense of well being to their sports teams in such a way that the tiniest of victories result in unimaginable bliss and any loss results in crippling depression?

I ask because after last night’s Bruins overtime loss to the Maple Leafs, the depression is pretty crippling and life doesn’t seem terribly worth living. That could all change in an instant if the Bruins win game six tomorrow. If they lose again though… there will likely be a long parade of Bruins fans lining up on the Tobin Bridge, just preparing themselves for the possibility of a game seven loss which would lead to most of them hurling themselves off of the largest bridge in Massachusetts (the previously mentioned Tobin Bridge) to escape the pain and suffering caused by yet another Bruins choke.

Are all sports fans this insane, or is it just a greater Boston area flavor of insanity? Inquiring minds need to know. I’m guessing people all over the globe are nuts like this, but Bostonians are just a little more nuttier. We could be, at least.

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Do I have to say it? Do I have to add a #sarcasm to this?