I am so fucking mad.
Our dishwasher had a leak. About two weeks ago. We payed a crap ton of money to get it fixed and it took over a week. I’ve run it two, maybe three times since. Last night we got the same leak error code that started the whole mess.
I am so incredibly pissed off.
Did I mention all of this started one day after the warranty expired? Yeah. Perfection.
Fucking shitty dishwasher. I want to rip it out of the wall and take an axe to it. With extreme prejudice.
Our huge kitchen remodel project completed one year and one day ago.
We’ve had three, count ’em three, problems with the new kitchen in the last couple of weeks. Two in the last two days. Today’s involves an appliance.
Are you fucking kidding me? One year? I’ve heard of planned obsolescence and shit, but one year?
It’s 10:37am. Did you miss me? I usually have a morning hello post hours earlier than this.
What kept me?
Pills. Yeah, man.
No, seriously. I just filled my parents’ pill caddies for the week. There was a lot of back and forth with my brother and sister. There are pharmacy changes coming in the near future and it’s affecting how we go about filling prescriptions and two of my mother’s 10000000 scripts need to be refilled this week because there aren’t enough pills to get us through to next week. Their primary care physician (who is also my primary care physician) is on the case though. All is well.
The bathroom is the other issue today. Not in an accident way, just in a there-is-only-one-in-the-house way. It seems like every time someone needs to go really bad there is someone already in there. I’ve been toilet blocked twice today, and I toilet blocked someone else once. It’s minor chaos.
My mother just shuffled into the room and asked me if I was her son and did she actually give birth to me.
I want to go home so badly I cannot put it into words. I am so tired of neglecting my family in favor of my family, you know? I was afraid to text Harry last night but Jen let me know that he was texting her, so I snuck in a couple. It’s only been one day and I miss him so much, and missing him makes me miss Bellana even more, and missing them both makes me so upset that I am here and not with Jen because I know she feels the same way, and it’s just crushing me so much I can’t even punctuate a sentence properly and I keep writing these endless run on things that when I go back to read these at some hypothetical point in the future are going to piss me off and now I am just doing it just because I am pissed off and I want my future self to also be pissed off at my grammar shenanigans and this is stupid and I am so miserable right now I can’t deal.
I think I am going to go upstairs and try to take apart a twin bed. No reason.
Fuck.
I don’t know what’s up today, but I am just not feeling all that together. It’s like I’m on the edge of being pissed off all the time, but I’m just too bummed out to put in the effort being mad requires. I don’t know.
I think it’s just one of those days where your democratic society is falling apart and half of the country is applauding the on coming dictatorship as if it’s actually a good thing and there is nothing you can do about it and you can’t even emigrate to someplace where the democratic society isn’t crumbling before your very eyes because if it’s happening here it’s clearly going to happen everywhere and fuck all that.
I played some guitar. It helped a little while I was doing it, but once I was done the feeling of existential dread came right back. We watched the new Pixar movie, Soul, and it was really good but the overall theme is one of existential dread so it kinda just compounded whatever crappy feeling I’m crappily feeling right now. Crap.
It’s 6:37 PM and I still have to do 27 minutes of exercise to hit my activity app goal. I don’t want to do it. I’m feeling too low. Then again, if I don’t do it I’ll feel worse.
Fuck those fucking nazis who are imploding my country. Fuck trump and his cult of toadies.
Fuck.
At least I have a triple batch of Tewksbury Tweets to binge eat while society comes unglued.
Greater Lawrence Technical School has us on a call list. They call us before 6:00am each weekday to remind us to wake up for school.
I left a very, very angry message.
They had best not call again.
Inside the Red Head's Head 