I live and work (and breathe and exist) in Massachusetts.  My step son lives with us half of the time and lives in New Hampshire with his father the rest of the time.  He goes to school in Dad’s town, not ours.  New Hampshire and Massachusetts hold their public school vacations in February and April on different weeks.  That’s why I completely forgot that this week was school vacation in Massachusetts.

I was driving to work this morning, thinking I left the house too late to get to the office on time, and I was kinda shocked at the utter lack of traffic jams.  There were a couple of notable slow spots, but nothing too infuriating.  The traffic was so light that I was actually weirded out.  Like, did something happen?  Should I turn on the radio to find out what’s going on?  Then it hit me… school vacation.  That glorious week where traffic problems magically disappear.  I literally let out a sigh of relief.  Oh hap-hap-happy day.

Normally the traffic is good during New Hampshire’s vacation week too, but not quite as good.  That won’t effect me this year though.  Why?  Because Jen and Harry and I are going down to Florida to spend Harry’s week off with our ol’ racist, possibly full on nazi, Uncle Walt.  We’re going to Disney World.

I may have written about this before but when I was a senior in High School my friend Damon was in a death metal band called Peanut Butter and Anarchy.  He wrote a song called “Mickey Mouse is the Anti-Christ.”  If I were to say that the lyrics to that song were brilliant, then I would be making an understatement the likes of which the English language has never before seen.  They weren’t brilliant.  They were brilliant times a thousand.  They were so far beyond brilliant that things that actually are brilliant looked like a fly buzzing around a lump of cow shit in a field somewhere in the mid-west.  The song was so popular with our little music department nerd sub-clique (or whatever it was) that when a local newspaper wrote a little blurb about possible cult activity at the high school we knew beyond any doubt that they were talking about us.  That’s why I still to this day think of a trip to Disney World as going to worship.

We’re getting close to the point where we need to start packing bags.  I just looked at an extended forecast for Orlando and the current prediction is for temperatures ranging from the high 60’s to the mid 80’s.  That’s shorts weather for sane people, but for me it’s jeans and a t-shirt weather.  The resort we’re staying in has a pretty epic pool so I’ll need a bathing suit, though my personal swimming mode of choice is more like boiling myself alive in a hot tub.  We’ll pick up sunscreen at the resort and I’ll want to wear a baseball hat and shades for the sun.  I’ll need my CPAP machine, unfortunately, and my laptop with some air travel entertainment downloaded.  I’ve spent so much time on music this month that I’ve fallen behind on every show I watch (except Star Trek: Picard.  I’m hanging on literally every word in that show, and hey it’s Seven of Nine!).  Other than that (and a tooth brush and some deodorant, oh yeah and my camera), I think I’m good.

I am pretty bummed that Disney World chose the month of February to close down the best ride in Magic Kingdom, Splash Mountain (of course).  They couldn’t have done that in March?  Jerks.  Let’s be real though, this trip is not about Magic Kingdom.  It’s not about Epcot.  It’s certainly not about Animal Kingdom.  It’s all about Hollywood Studios.  It’s all about Galaxy’s Edge.  It’s all about Rise of the Resistance.





I want to absorb every single inch of the Star Wars experience that is Galaxy’s Edge.  I want to delight in every spec of dust.  If it’s in Galaxy’s Edge then I want to do it.  I want to build a droid.  I really, really want to build a light saber (even though its insanely expensive).  I want to ride in the Millennium Falcon.  I want to do whatever Rise of the Resistance does.  That one I bet I am going to want to do over and over again.  I just looked up wait times.  Smuggler’s Run is 120+ minutes.  Rise of the Resistance is closed.  Well thanks for putting the fear of the Dark Side into me, you god damned Mouse!!!  I don’t actually know if that ride takes walk ups so maybe they just don’t report wait times.  If it is closed right now I’m sure it’s a temporary maintenance thing.  Disney rides go off line all the time.  You just wait a little bit and they open back up.  That’s all this is.  It just happened to be happening while I am sitting here gushing with anticipation… jerks.

Anyway, Jen and Harry have a pretty solid itinerary set out for us, including at least one Hollywood Studios rope drop which will hopefully get us into Rise of the Resistance with a minimum of torturous waiting.  I am really looking forward to it.  I’d just be happy to take a week off of work and check out from reality for a few days, but if I get to play with life sized Star Wars toys as I do it then hell yes let’s do it!

I’ve been going to the gym a lot this month.  Not regularly enough, but I’ve been getting there.  I slacked badly last week but I won’t this week.  As I’ve written here before, I don’t do a lot when I’m there, just 15-20 minutes of walking on a treadmill.  I’m just trying to practice for the miles of walking I’ll be doing next week.  Every little bit helps, I hope.  I went last night and I am going tonight.  I should be good tomorrow too (fingers crossed).  Friday will be tough, unless I go around midnight.  I might just do it.  We’ll see.

2.5 work days left to go.  I am out of my mind with all the antici-