I just had a really distressing experience. One that I bet 99% of you out there in internet land cannot relate to in any way.
Here’s the quick back story. I’m tall. Due to a seeming inaccuracy of height measuring devices across New England, I am either six foot four inches tall, six foot five inches tall, or six foot six inches tall.
The 6’6″ measurement was probably just wishful thinking on my 19 year old self’s part. 6’4″ is probably a calibration error on a doctor’s office scale/measurement device. I’m probably 6’5″. Maybe a hair less than that. Whatever the accurate statistic is, I am tall. Really tall.
However, a few minutes ago I was feeling small. Diminutive, even.
I was in line for lunch at the cafeteria and there were two guys standing directly in front of me. One of them was about my height. It’s rare, but it happens. He was probably a shade taller than I. I would have guessed that he was a legitimate 6’6″.
That’s not the crazy part. The crazy part was the guy he was waiting in line with. That guy had at least five inches in height over me. He towered over me. He downright dwarfed me. That doesn’t happen often at all. It’s very rare. Not unheard of, but rare. That was the crazy part, but not the really crazy part.
The really crazy part was the combination. There were TWO guys in front of me in line and they were BOTH taller than me! Both of them! Holy crap, two guys who were actually waiting in line together, having a pleasant conversation, were BOTH TALLER THAN ME!
I honestly can’t remember the last time that happened. When I was in college (the last time) and I had a show on the campus radio station (WUML, Lowell) we did a weekly segment with the men’s basketball coach. He was taller than me. One time he brought one of his players on the air with him. You would think that would have been an occasion where there were two taller people in the room with me, but no. I was taller than the player (by a tiny bit). I think the last time this happened was probably high school. Grade 9 maybe. I can’t even say that for sure. I might have to go all the way back to Junior High!
Needless to say it felt awfully strange standing there being the short guy. I’m all out of sorts now. Now I know how Hobbits must feel, and now I know why they live in holes in the ground!