Tag: Back Yard Wild Kingdom

New Bird Feeders Day

I bought a couple new bird feeders from Amazon. They are fine and all, but when you buy online you really can’t judge sizes and these things are really small. I am disappointed. Maybe I’ll go to Home Depot or Lowes and try again. Not until we get home from Florida though. These will do for now, even if the blue jays in the yard are pissed because they are too big to sit on the ledge. Sorry, blue jays.

Robin watched me hang the new bird feeders through the dirty window screen. She’s still sitting there but she’s chirping at the birds and the squirrels and the chipmunks. I think she wants to get out there and kill some stuff.

Sunday Morning

The backyard had a visitor this morning.

There were actually two turkeys. I think this one might have been showing off for the other.

Also, while we’re on the subject, miraculously the window mounted bird house survived the night. No tenants yet though.

For the Birds

First there is this…

Both of those bird feeders need to be replaced ASAP. One of them had a big chunk crack off just because I tried to lift the lid. They are literally crumbling in front of my eyes.

Second, there is this stupid thing…

I cleaned the holy crap out of the window, and still the suction cups that hang this sucker barely stuck. I 100% expect that within an hour or two I will check on its status and find that it fell off.

Until then, here’s a view from inside…

I suspect this puppy will be filed under “dud.”

Peanuts

I had this grand plan to grow peanuts in the back yard. I researched how to do it and made a list of all of the things I would need to make it happen.

Now that it’s Spring, it’s time to do it…

And I think I have decided not to bother.

There is no way the rodents living in the woods behind our house would let a plant like a peanut plant slip past their stomachs. Anything I try to grow out there is going to get eaten by one critter or another.

Yeah… I think the peanut plan is kaput.

The home made sugar free ice cream plan though… that mofo is still on. Just you watch.

Dumb Bird

Want to hear a story about a bird with a low IQ?

Here we go.

I got up early today and did my morning exercise in the basement. When I was done I went upstairs and started packing up my lunch bag as today is a work in the office day. I was standing in the little space between the living room and the dining room, digging through the pantry closet where my protein bar stash lives and I heard a weird nose. It was a low, metallic rumbling sound. It only lasted for a second and then it stopped. A minute or so later I heard it again.

What the hell was it? My first thought was maybe there was a problem with our central air system? No, it’s not that. It happened again and it sounded like it was coming from the living room. I don’t get it. I asked Jen if she knew what it was but she hadn’t heard it. When it happened again I found it was coming from the fireplace. That eased my mind a little. It was probably something outside and we were just hearing it through the chimney. It happened again and it seemed really loud, but it was definitely in the chimney.

I went outside, where it was a crisp 36 degrees out, and took a look. From the front of the house I couldn’t see anything. I walked around to the back, with a sneaking suspicion of what I was going to find, and sure enough my suspicion was accurate.

There is a metal cap on the top of our chimney. It sits on top of a metal, mesh thing so that the smoke can escape, but it’s literally a cap on top of the opening. Standing next to this cap was a freakin’ woodpecker. Every minute or so this moron was bashing away at the chimney cap (or whatever you call it) trying to… eat something? I don’t know. This bird was an idiot. I laughed at its stupidity and it heard me, got spooked, and flew away.

Dumb bird.

Deer

I took these through the window next to my desk. It was right around sunset. Please forgive the reflections of the lights that are getting in the way of everything.

Back yard wild kingdom on the first day of winter, 2023/24.

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Say Your Prayers

Dig what I just saw in the back yard wild kingdom…

Looks like a praying mantis to me. I Googled “brown praying mantis” and sure enough, there are brown praying mantises. Groovy. I don’t think I’ve ever seen one of these for real before. What an ugly SOB (though not as ugly as a house centipede, those bastards look like pure, unadulterated evil). I would have squished it, but I think she could probably take me in a straight up fight.