This is a true story.

Really.

No kidding.

On Monday morning at about 3:45am or so I woke up.  I don’t know what woke me up, but I got out of bed and drained the lizard (pardon the metaphor) and then looked out the window to see if it was still snowing.  It wasn’t.  I then went back to bed and fell asleep right away.

At a little before 6:00am I woke up again.  The alarm had gone off and, while I had a vacation day booked and had no plans to leave the house, I got up to brush the snow off the cars so my sweet wife wouldn’t have to.  As I was trying to sit up I thought to myself that there was something wrong with my foot.  It hurt a little bit.  I then put my feet on the ground and stood up.

Holy Toledo!

Damn, did that hurt!  The pain is on top of my foot, maybe off to the side a little, just South of the big toe.  What had I done to deserve this?  I put on a shoe and it hurt a lot.  I was a little swollen, I guess.  I went outside and did my thing.  My beautiful bride left for work and I went back inside.  I changed into a dry pair of shoes and there was still some pain and discomfort but it wasn’t as bad as it had been.  I think it was because my shoes fit snugly and were offering some nice support.

Last night just before bed I took my shoes off and the pain came back.  Through the night it was bad enough to wake me up a couple of times.  Today at work I have a real limp and it hurts pretty much constantly.

So the question is, what the hell happened during the two hours or so I was sleeping between 4:00 am and 6:00 am?

I think the cat had something to do with it.  I know she’s plotting to kill me.  Duh.  I mean, what else do cats do with their time?  But in this case I think she was messing with me.  I think she performed some surgery on my foot and maybe removed a bone or a tendon or something.  Our cute little Patches is just psycho enough to try something like that.

I’ll keep a closer eye on her from now on.  I’m watching you, kitty.

I’m watching you.