Tag: edmonton-oilers

Tied at One After One

Happy Stanley Cup Final Game Seven day, everyone.

After one period of play, the Oilers and the Panthers are tied at one goal each.

40 minutes of regulation play remaining to find out if the Panthers can avoid the most pathetic collapse in professional sports history*, or if the Oilers can complete the greatest come back in pro sports history.

I’m rooting for the Oilers, but given how impossible it is to come back from down three games to none in a seven game series, my money (if I had any) would be on the Panthers… even though I friggin’ hate them.

Come on, Edmonton. Let’s do the impossible and bring the Stanley Cup back to Canada where it would belong if it didn’t actually belong in Boston.

*Sure, there have been a bunch of instances of teams winning a series after being down 0-3. It’s happened in Boston twice. The Bruins blew the three games to none lead against Philly in 2010 and I have still not recovered, even though they won the Cup one year later. In happier news, the only time it’s happened in Major League Baseball history is when the Red Sox came back from down 0-3 to take the American League Championship Series from the fucking Yankees.

Why is this the biggest come back ever? I think it’s happened five or six times in pro sports history, but I don’t think it’s ever happened in a championship round. Pretty sure this would be the first. All the more reason to consider it impossible.

It would be nice to see Florida blow it and lose in utterly humiliating fashion, but it still wouldn’t make up for them beating the Bruins two postseasons in a row. It’s a start though.

Bring On Game Seven

So I pick the Oilers to win the Stanley Cup. Then Florida wins the first three games easily and I give up on hope and declare that the Panthers have more or less already won. Then as soon as I stop caring, the Oilers turn around and win the next three games easily.

Damn it.

The Oilers won game six tonight by a score of 5-1. The series is now even at three games all. Game seven is Monday night because the NHL schedule is made by idiots who thought it fine to not have gave seven on a weekend. Come on, guys. It’s game effin’ seven. Have it on an effin’ weekend. What the hell is wrong with you jerks?

I’m still rooting for the Oilers. I’m also still convinced that the Panthers are not going to lose four games in a row. I guess we’ll see what happens on Monday then, right?

Two nights from now we’ll get the last game of the 2023-24 NHL season. That’s followed by three months of nuttin’ honey. Blah.

Hockey Tease

The Oilers lost the first three games of the Stanley Cup Final series to the Panthers, virtually guaranteeing the Cup will go to Florida.

Then in game four, the Oilers won in a blow out. Tonight, in game five, the Oilers are up 4-2 after two periods.

If you were wondering what the hockey equivalent of a dick tease felt like, then know that this is it.

Even if the Oilers win tonight, there is still virtually no chance of them coming all the way back to win the Stanley Cup. They are just trying to give me a little hope so that Florida can crush my dreams the way they did when the eliminated my Bruins, both this year’s playoffs and last year’s playoffs.

Sure, I am happy the Oilers are winning in game five. It’s just going to make it more painful when they eventually lose.

In other news, the Red Sox beat Toronto again tonight. That’s four wins in a row for my home town team. I’ll take that.

NHL Playoff Predictions: Stanley Cup Final

I can’t remember a time when I was this blah for the last two rounds of the NHL playoffs. Blah, I say!

The Conference Finals are over. It is time to review how my predictions did in round three, and to make my pick for the Stanley Cup Final. Over the first two rounds I had correctly chosen the winner in six of 12 series. 6/12 is terrible, but it is WAY better than my coin flip control group which has been correct in three out of 12 series. That is just pathetic.

So how did we do with the two series in round three?

Rangers vs Panthers. You know, this is what happens when you live in Boston and put your faith in a friggin’ team from friggin’ New York. Of course the Rangers lost. Assholes. You guys suck. That sound you hear off in the distance is me screaming in hockey related frustration. I hate the Florida Panthers so much that I cannot accurately put it into words. I hate them so much that I was rooting for New York. Argh! I picked the Rangers and was wrong. That puts me at 6/13. The coin, the prick, picked the Panthers. It is now 4/13.

Stars vs Oilers. I feel a little better about this one. I am ambivalent about the Stars and I kinda find the Oilers enjoyable. That’s why I picked the Oilers. The coin flip picked Edmonton too. That puts me back at 50% at 7/14, and moves the coin to 5/14.

I guess that means that now it’s time to make my pick for the final.

Panthers vs Oilers. As I previously stated, I hate the Panthers with the burning passion of 1000000000 suns, and I kinda like the Oilers. I am making this pick with my heart and not my head and I’m picking the Oilers. Let’s bring that Stanley Cup back to Canada, shall we? For the coin flip, heads goes to the higher seed, which is Florida. The coin flip is tails. That means the coin and I both picked Edmonton.

You heard it here first, kids. The Oilers are going to win the cup this year. Pretty please, at least. We have a long wait for game one, as the series doesn’t start until Saturday. Five days from now. Hey NHL… WTF is up with that? What is this, the NBA? Damn it!